Land, ho! The Seafair Pirates rush the shore to plunder
Avast, me hearties! Did ye know it be International Talk Like A Pirate Day? If yer not wantin' ta be a scallywag on this fine day, then ye best read on ta... Oh, you get the picture! It's the one day a year when it's really cool to talk like a pirate, and if you have little ones, chances are they love everything to do with pirates. Take a few minutes to study up on the holiday and have some fun with your kids today!
A quick history
Wondering how TLAPD got started? It goes back to a friendly game of racquetball between two guys, John Baur and Mark Summers. For reasons neither can recall, during this particular game they began offering words of encouragement to one another in pirate slang. They had so much fun they decided it should be a national holiday and chose September 19 as the date because it was Summers's ex-wife's birthday and not taken up by any other major holiday, "like Christmas or the Superbowl." The two celebrated TLAPD with friends for several years before Dave Barry, a nationally syndicated columnist, was alerted to their special day. He wrote about it one year, on TLAPD of course, and the result is the reason why you're reading this today! Thousands of people began to observe TLAPD and Summers and Baur began to receive interview requests from all over the world. Oh, and they now prefer to be called Cap'n Slappy and Ol' Chumbucket.
Pirate phrases
Ok, so it's TLAPD, now what? You want to impress your kiddos with the appropriate lingo but you can only get so far with "Ahoy, matey," "Shiver me timbers," and "Walk the plank!" Here are a few phrases that might be familiar and some not-so-familiar but will get you through the day.
"Avast!" - means stop and pay attention (all parents should make this part of their every day vocabulary).
"Aye!" - means yes, "Aye aye" means "I'll get right on it!"
"Grog" - an alcoholic drink, but the kiddos don't need to know that. You can tell them to call their milk, water or juice grog for the day instead.
"Lubber" - quite an insult, as it pertains to someone who doesn't go to sea like the pirates do. If you're children fight a lot and say nasty things to one another, you might suggest switching to the phrase lubber. Who knows? It might actually make them laugh and stop arguing.
"Smartly" - means to move quickly. Try saying "Pick up yer toys, lads, and ya best be doin' it smartly."
"Dungbie" - a rear-end. As in, "Get yer dungbie in here an' clean yer dirty quarters smartly!" Keester means the same thing.
"Belay" - means to stop immediately. "Belay yer blubberin' an' git back on yer bike, me lad! 'Tis only a scratch."
"Scurvy" - a nasty little affliction that pirates loathed, making it an insult if compared to it. That's why you often hear phrases like "scurvy pirate" if one pirate is trash talking another.
"Scallywag" - another common pirate insult. These guys didn't play nice!
"Booty" - a treasure that pirates have looted (not to be confused with Pirate's Booty, the tasty veggie chips). "Come git yer booty that ye be leavin' in the livin' room, else it's out with the trash!"
Make it authentic
You can say all the phrases you please, but there's more to TLAPD than just words. You have to put some effort into how you speak. For instance, it's recommended you gesture with your arms and hands when you speak. You should speak loudly, without frightening your children, and growl often. Have fun telling tall tales and getting carried away with stories.
Need more help?
Check out the website of Cap'n Slappy and Ol' Chumbucket for lots of tips, phrases, and fun.
Wikihow will take you through the necessary steps to talk like a pirate.
Don't forget your local pirates, the Seafair Pirates. Alas, the scurvy bilge rats be partyin' in Portland this weekend.
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