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Looking Back With Sarcasm: The 2005 NFL Draft (pt.2)

For part one of the 2005 NFL Draft Day timeline, click here. 

 

2:52pm - Back in the ESPNXYZ studios, Andrea Kramer leads a discussion about former Vikings receiver Randy Moss which almost ends up in fistfight between Trent Green and Mike Vrabel. This proves conclusively that Moss is a troublemaker, since he was able to stir up problems on two other teams in the middle of the offseason without even being in the room.

3:06pm - Dallas uses Buffalo's first round pick. In short, Buffalo gave Dallas a first round pick and Drew Bledsoe, and the Bills still walked away feeling like they got the better end of the deal.

3:30pm - The Oakland Raiders draft a defensive back in the first round for the fourth time in five years. A commercial airs for a new movie called "No Idea," featuring Drew Barrymore and Jimmy Fallon in the story of a man obsessed with the Oakland Raiders draft. The reviews refer to it as "non-start fun."

3:52pm - Green Bay selects Cal quarterback Aaron Rodgers, ending our long national nightmare. Rodgers thanks the Division Champion Packers for selecting him. Rodgers says he has no pressure now, and can progress at his own rate, learn the game behind Brett Favre, and not have to start until he's ready.

3:53pm - New San Francisco quarterback Alex Smith asks Rodgers if he'd like to swap jerseys with him.

4:09pm - Seattle picks an offensive lineman, in spite of the fact that least year's receiving corps dropped more balls than a drunken juggler in a centrifuge.

4:12pm - Indianapolis drafts defensive back Marlin Jackson, thus confounding Colts fans who are unfamiliar with the concept of "defense."

4:20pm - ESPN pitches to another entire network, ESPNU, for more commentary. Coverage will also spill over onto ESPN2, ESPN Classic, ESPN News, BET, HGTV, Nickelodeon, and the TV Guide channel.

4:51pm - Philadelphia selects defensive tackle Mike Patterson, then sends him over to Terrell Owens' house to rough him up.

5:02pm - The New England Patriots make their pick, guard Logan Mankins. As has become Boston tradition, Mankins is handed a Red Sox jersey and makes a victory lap around Fenway Park.

5:03pm - The NFL Draft's longest first round ever finally ends. The ESPN crew breaks for snacks, drinks, and a quick re-oiling of the computer parts of Mel Kiper, Draft Expert's brain.

9:52pm - Long known as a man who can lead any running back to a thousand yard season, Denver Broncos coach Mike Shanahan selects Maurice Clarett with the final pick of the third round, thus setting himself up for a risk that would make David Blaine shudder.

 

More Draft Day mayhem:
2008 NFL Draft (Matt Ryan, Joe Flacco) timeline, click here. 
2007 NFL Draft (Adrian Peterson, Calvin Johnson) timeline, click here. 
2006 NFL Draft (Vince Young, Reggie Bush) timeline, click here.  
2004 NFL Draft (Eli Manning, Larry Fitzgerald) timeline, click here.  
2003 NFL Draft (Carson Palmer, Charles Rogers) timeline, click here.  
2002 NFL Draft (David Carr, Joey Harrington) timeline, click here.
2001 NFL Draft (Michael Vick, LT, Philip Rivers) timeline, click here.  
2000 NFL Draft (Courtney Brown, Sebastian Janikowski) timeline, click here.
1999 NFL Draft (Ricky Williams, Donovan McNabb) timeline, click here.