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Trying to be invisible - going to church with autism
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Church worship services are a deep cultural and spiritual experience. A family tradition that holds strong even in tough times. For many the church is a place of tranquility and acceptance. Fellow church members are people one can turn to when extra help is needed.
When a parishioner is diagnosed with cancer, traumatic injury or hard economic times, the church membership is by their side, carrying them when needed, lifting them up when needed and standing beside them when needed. And rightly so. But what happens when a family needs the church members to stand beside them due to an autism diagnosis?
In the Bible belt it is expected most everyone attends church on Sunday morning and Sunday night in addition to a midweek service usually on Wednesday night. There are often activities for the youth to participate in outside regular church hours. Many focus on grooming their young to become good church leaders.
Even with all these resources, if you are a family with a member who has autism, you probably spend most of your time "trying to be invisible". Many families in Alabama who have children with developmental disabilities or autism have admitted to quitting church due to the unwelcomed feeling they receive.
Even though the Church should be the most inclusive, the most accommodating, the most accessible sadly this is not the case. Programs are planned but the teachers don't make accommodations for children who need extra assistance, accessibility remains an issue in churches entrances, and children with disabilities are expected to remain with their parents at all times. Those who are taken in to Sunday School or Vacation Bible School are sometimes placed in the nursery class.
" Indeed, many parents of children with autism give up on public worship altogether, weary of the frustration and embarrassment, angry with the real or perceived judgment of others.
It is not easy to worship, nor to watch the discomfort of those around you, when your child blurts out unintelligible noises, rocks back and forth or bolts for the door at random moments.
I can't tell you how many mothers have come to me and said, 'We stopped coming to church. People look at us, and it's just not worth it,' " says Brent Petersen, a psychiatrist and clinical director at the Carmen B. Pingree Center for Children with Autism. " sltrib.com
Churches in Utah have recently joined together and held a symposium on meeting the needs of families with disabilities. This was helpful in bringing to light issues that church leaders had not even considered before the meeting.
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