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How to conquer your inner critic
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My clients often ask, “How do I continue moving forward towards my dreams, when I have an inner saboteur?” We all have dreams that can be derailed by our inner critic. The critic tells us that what we want is impossible. That we can’t, we are incapable, or that what we want will never be. Often times we dismiss the critic, referring to it as the thing that keeps us “real” or “grounded” and so we give up on our dreams and ourselves. Do we need to succumb to the inner critic; to allow it to rule our lives and dreams? The truth is you don’t need to live tormented with your inner gremlins. First you need to take a moment to assess how this critical voice is impacting you. Ask yourself, “Is this voice serving or hindering me?” If you feel it is, then just know that it is there to continue guiding you as you move through life. If it is not helping you, then it is time to let it go!
So how do you fight your own critical voice? That’s just it, you don’t! How many times have you tried to fight yourself? It’s a no win situation. That is why the key is to learn how to integrate it so that it is in alignment with the rest of you, not in conflict with your other thoughts and actions. There are many ways of letting go or integrating the inner critic, below are just a few:
Sometimes it’s enough to acknowledge that the inner critic is there. It loosens its hold from your thoughts by virtue of conscious awareness of its presence. Still, for many of us, it has a strong hold and if that is the case for you there are other avenues to try. You can use a coach or therapist as a guide, or you might try the following. First, find out what the intent of the critic is, to know its purpose is to acknowledge the reason it exists. By understanding the purpose, you can opt for a more integrated way of honoring the inner critic and its purpose. For example, if your inner critic’s purpose is to keep you financially secure, you might put a plan together to ensure financially security while you pursue your dream. By putting a financial plan together, you fulfill the inner critic’s purpose in a way that is integrated with you and your dream instead of in conflict.
The more in harmony you are with all parts of you, the more you will accomplish. Try it out; you may be surprised with what you find!
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