RSS
Home
Worse than evil, Letterman's unfunny
Print
Email
RSS
Subscribe
Letterman -- not a monster. Just not funny anymore.
Let there be no doubt: There is reason to be outraged by David Letterman's slope-browed joke at the expense of the Palin family. It was a third-class hack of an attempt at topical humor written by a low-rent writer and delivered by a washed-up comic propped up by a long-term, mega-million dollar contract and a viewing audience which apparently tunes in out of habit rather than any desire to be entertained. And the outrage is out there in spades, so let's all stop asking where it is.
But, at some point, you've got to just let the outrage be. Unfortunately, many conservatives are so starved for some kind of moral victory that they jump at any chance to give a comeuppance to an antagonist, and too often, they overreach. In this case, that overreach comes in the form of calls for Letterman to be fired by CBS.
Demands for Letterman's firing go too far for a couple of reason: (1) They sound like opportunism to the ears of most objective people and (2) it's just not going to happen. And, the problem with taking the issue this far is that it winds up being a net-loss for conservative activists who take up the cause. It's akin to going on safari and returning with a rabbit pelt to display in your living room floor.
Rabbit pelts are fine if you're just rabbit hunting. But, once you set out for big game, you're expected to bring back something that makes for a nice, dangerous-looking rug rather than a display surface for a Boy Scout's arrowhead collection. Now, after all the teeth-gnashing on the right, it seems likely that conservatives will end up the Elmer Fudd of this saga, going home with a pocket full of spent shells and no quarry. A sadly familiar return from the field for the right in recent years.
There's a simple reason why these various uprisings, boycotts, and campaigns never work for conservatives: As a group, we just don't strike a sympathetic figure. In fact, the very idea behind these attempts to extract retribution and contrition for every slight, real or perceived, runs counter to one of the basic traits that conservatives believe set them apart from the left. That is, the idea that perpetual grievance mongering and the victim mentality are destructive, both personally and as they relate to society at large.
Think about it for a moment. If you spend 99% of your time telling everyone around you, whether they have a legitimate gripe or not, to simply "get over it," what are the odds that anyone is going to feel compelled to give you an even break whenever you don the drama queen's tiara? On top of that, these boycotts and public pressure campaigns rely on a compliant media to further them. Now, whose side do you think they're going to take?
None of this is to say that conservatives don't have a right to express their outrage and demand apologies. Gov. Palin in particular has every right to do so, and one would fully expect for her to rise up in defense of her daughter. It's what any mother worth her salt would do in that situation. But, there are basic facts of life to face up to in this controversy, and one of them is that the notion that the media is going to be shamed into holding David Letterman to the same standard to which they would hold Rush Limbaugh is pure fantasy. Yes, my conservative friends, you need to hear it: "Get over it!"
There are better ways to deal with creeps like David Letterman. Accusing him of making light of rape, or literally advocating it, goes beyond the limits of public credulity. Why paint "Dave" as a monster when all he really amounts to is a wiseacre who stepped in it because he's just not funny anymore? And, perverse as it may seem, that's really the point that conservatives should go after if they really want their pound of flesh.
You see, being a creep, a weirdo, or even a pederast is a relatively minor crime in the entertainment world. Think Roman Polanski, Michael Jackson, Woody Allen . . . need I go on? The far bigger crime, in fact, is to be "lame". And, if anyone has outlasted his usefulness and begun mailing it in as twilight descends on his career and reputation, it's David Letterman. Why go after him from an angle that's bound to whipsaw on its proponents and ultimately turn him into the victim when you can easily and forthrightly make the case that he's old, slow and irrelevant?
This is where conservatives miss so many opportunities to change the way they're perceived and to actually have an impact on the culture. Trey Parker and Matt Stone, the creators of South Park, regularly and brilliantly skewer people like Letterman on a weekly basis. How would they handle him? By simply portraying him as the ridiculously pathetic figure he's become over the years, and being just as unapologetic as Letterman himself in doing so.
It's high time conservatives learned that demanding apologies from people like David Letterman is akin to teaching an orangutan to brush its teeth. Yes, they'll mimic the behavior, but they'll never quite get it. And they're only doing it for whatever reward they get in return. In the case of the orangutan, that may be a banana. In Letterman's case, it's the warm applause of people who weren't offended in the first place, and the tendency among the public to say, "There! He said it. Can we move on, now?"
When it comes to big shot movie stars and late night talk show hosts being jerks, it all boils down to whether or not you want insincere expressions of remorse, or results. If you want results, don't make them apologize. Make them pay.
Related Articles:
Comments
