Technology, especially the advent of cheap high-speed Internet, has revolutionized dating in the last decade. The faceless personal ads of the nineties, with their cryptic abbreviations, such as SWF 35 ISO S/D/Wi W/B/A M 25-55 NS w/GSOH for LTR, have given way to fanciful essays and photos, describing their writer’s life and aspirations.
In the 90s online dating sites were widely considered to be the refuge of the desperate. They have become so mainstream that in 2007, one out of eight marriages was attributed to an online meeting. Currently, there are about 1,000 online dating sites, which keep the industry morphing as it responds to customer demand. At the moment, personality tests have become all the rage.
Online dating’s seemingly infinite parade of new faces has created the “efficiency dater” who turns dating into a high-stakes job interview. This person mistakenly believes that wielding checklists and ruthlessly eliminating prospects with whom he or she doesn’t have instant chemistry will quickly yield the perfect relationship.
As always, some people lie about their age, height and weight. You can’t always trust photos—some are old or drastically altered. Good detective work continues to be part of dating.
Google, along with a variety of online investigative services, make it possible for you to check out almost anyone. No one has yet figured out a search that will tell you if how someone will treat you or if they might be “The One” for you.
Science has been doing its best to unlock the mysteries of love and attraction. Anthropologist Helen Fisher and Brain Researcher Dr. Louann Brizendine have been popularizing love and compatibility research regarding how our brains respond to love and romance, as well as the effect that hormones have on us. This will likely influence how we view love well into the next decade.
Other technological innovations have changed the face of dating. In the 90s, if you wanted to video date, you had to go to a dating service. As we move into 2010, instant message, Skype and video chat are commonplace.
In the nineties, folks relied on friends, family, classes, singles clubs or parties to meet new people. Today, you can create your own event and invite others to join with sites like Meetup and Bay Area Linkup. These allow you to organize your own group, such as Marin Moonshiners or Bay Area Backroads hikes, and invite the public or those you are interested in dating to your events.
For those coming out of a long relationship, modern day dating is almost unrecognizable. Do all of the changes bode well? The downside is that there are more checklists and more people treating love as a science project. The upside is that love is within reach of more people than ever.
Here’s to a great love life in 2010!
If you want to hear more about how men and women approach dating--and discover the secrets to why they say and do the things they do, Annie Gleason and Alpha Male Coach Carlos Xuma will be co-hosting a seminar "He Says/She Says: Power Secrets to Demystifying Dating For Adults" on January 30th, 2010. There is two women remaining...men will be wait-listed Click here for more details.
San Francisco based midlife dating coach, Annie Gleason, teams up with singles who are frustrated with the dating scene and helps them to transform their love lives with her exclusive five-step program.
For more info: Check out dating classes, events and midlife dating information at www.getalovelife.net or email annie@getalovelife.net
Comments
Annie, you gave a good summary of how mid-life dating has changed in the past ten years. I'd like for you to summarize how teenage and college-age dating has changed because I'm so perplexed by it all. My eighteen year olds say they "hang out" but they don't date.
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