Your link to saving pain and expense during your divorce

So you’re going through a divorce. Of course you want to talk about your feelings and betrayals.

But what if you knew that spending more time listening, instead of speaking, helps your chances of settlement? It is true. You won’t get your point of view across by talking about it; you do it by listening to our partner’s point of view.

One of the most instrumental steps in persuading your soon-to-be ex to settle out of court is to listen, and hear, what your partner is saying.

People rarely change their minds until they have spoken their piece, so let them speak to their heart’s content. This costs you nothing and is the best investment you can make.

If you want to save yourself from the financial and emotional burdens of a long, drawn out, courtroom ordeal, convince your spouse that you are trying to understand their side of the story.

They aren’t going to hear you out if you haven’t heard them out first.

U.S. Educationist Edward Dale, author of the Cone of Experience, said people remember 20 percent of what they hear, 50 percent of what they see and hear, and 70 percent of what they discuss with others.

With this in mind, it helps to be particularly attentive as your spouse speaks and really hear what he/she is saying. Once you do this, your partner will be more likely to listen to what you are saying.

It is tough listening to what they have to say, especially when you know they are wrong. But this shows respect and respect leads to cooperation, as opposed to confrontation. Take the initiative and good things may happen. If you don’t take the initiative, good things will never happen.

Listening to what your spouse says and validating their right to think as they do is how the settlement process becomes possible. Without this link, you are making your divorce more difficult than it has to be.

Listen, hear, and prosper. Listen to their heart’s content.