Examiner.com

Anyone who has ever been through a divorce knows the pain and the loneliness that goes along with it.  Fortunately, it doesn’t have to be that way.

Introduced in 1994, DivorceCare is 13-week program offered by several churches in Maryland to help people deal with the pain of divorce.  Joseph Northcut is the Director of Church Ministries at Church Initiative, Inc. in North Carolina who oversees DivorceCare.  He was introduced to the seminar as a single adult pastor in Oklahoma and was one of the first pastors to try it.  He estimated that 100 folks attended the first two cycles of his DivorceCare presentation. “It’s an incredible tool,” he said of the program.  We had so many non-church people attend,” he said. They were just hurting.”

Since then, Pastor Joseph conservatively estimates that over a half million people have taken the course over the past 15 years.  Currently, he said, there are 40 active groups in Maryland.

Two churches in Maryland that offer DivorceCare are Community Christian Church in White Marsh, and Mountain Christian Church in Joppa.  Both hold the seminar at their church. Both also use folks who have already been through the seminar.  Some of the topics that they cover include understanding what is happening, dealing with anger, depression, anger, and finances.

“I went through DivorceCare when I went through my separation and divorce in 2003,” said John Conway, one of the facilitators at Community Christian Church, adding, “It’s nice to know that God was still with me even during one of the most painful parts of my life.”

John and another friend, Kathy Ressler, began facilitating DivorceCare at Community Christian in 2006. They generally host the program three times a year.  One of the benefits for John in teaching the course is watching people change in such a short period of time.  “I wanted to be there for others who have been through divorce,” he said.  We are not there as counselors, we are there to tell them, hey, we’ve been there too.”

That’s one of the beauties of DivorceCare, notes Pastor Joseph.  “It’s usually lay-led,” he said.

Folks who attend the course usually become quick friends afterward.  Such is the case at Mountain Christian where their DivorceCare seminars have spun off into other groups and Bible studies.  That’s because after DivorceCare ends, other issues remain with those who attended such as child care and finances.  Phil Kotschenreuther is one of six current facilitators at Mountain.  He went through DivorceCare in 2005.  “I couldn’t think of anywhere else to go but the church,” he remembers at the time.  “If it wasn’t for DivorceCare, I could not have healed as quickly as I did.  The Lord called me to help others get through it.

Now, he and his co-facilitators offer the program two to three times a year. Like Community Christian Church, he has seen many people who do not attend a church, or folks from other spiritual backgrounds attend.  From there he has seen people heal as they go through the course and build friendships.

Despite its growing popularity and need, DivorceCare rarely advertises.  “Our biggest marketing tool is word of mouth, notes Pastor Joseph.  For those looking for a DivorceCare group near them, they can simply visit DivorceCare’s website at http://www.DivorceCare.org/startagroup/, plug in their ZIP Code, and voila, there’s the closest group.  Please call to verify the seminar’s schedule and if it is still active.