Step two in a Marathon Marriage according to the Pre-Cana lecture hosted by John and Patty Hadden is to pray together. Now I don’t know about you, but this makes me a little squirmy. I’m comfortable with personal prayer and knowing God on a personal level, but outside of Mass, I don’t usually pray with people.
Okay so if it is uncomfortable why in the world is this step 2? Multiple articles on this topic quote statistics saying that couples who pray together have a significantly lower divorce rate than couples who don’t. While I can’t find the survey that was conducted on this specific topic, I did find information from the Baylor University's Institute for Studies of Religion that says couples who pray experience a 20 to 30 present elevation in romance, conversation, and various levels of marital happiness.
More romance and happiness could make it worth getting over the awkward part. But how do you start? John and Patty Hadden shared with the group how they pray as a couple. They said they are runners (hence the name of the lecture “marathon marriage”). When they decided to start praying together, they chose to do so after a run during the cool-down walk. They’d finish there run, take hands, and pray together while they walked back home.
Sounds like a good plan, but we don't run toether. Knowing that, the said the most important thing is to find a time and a process that works well for both people. A great article on praying as a couple is available here from www.foryourmarriage.com. Here are the steps to take to begin praying together according to the article:
- Pick a time that works for both people. Popular times are in the morning before the day gets crazy or right before bed.
- Pick a place that will be quiet and allow you to focus on prayer.
- Decide if you’ll do this daily and how long you’ll do it. Other articles have stated that benefits can come from just a few minutes a day.
- Decide how you’ll pray. Just like with personal prayer, there are many options. You can use a book to guide you or take turns saying your prayers back and forth. I particularly like the recommendation from the article to hold hands in the morning and “offer a prayer for a good day, help with a particular problem, or thanksgiving.” Then do the same thing at night.
It can be uncomfortable, but the benefits can be incredibly worthwhile. Personally, I hope that once we are married we can start small, with just a few minutes a day and let the practice grow from there.
If you liked this article you might like these: Marathon step 1 - personal prayer, Marathon marriage step 3 - worship together or Five steps for a marathon marraige.
For more information: Click here for a great article on how to pray. This article on praying as a couple comes from the UK, and has a lot of great information. And here is another great article on praying as a couple from the Catholic Digest.
Join the conversation: Do you pray as a couple? Would you consider it? If you do, how do you do it? I'm new to this -- what are your recommendations for a great marriage?
Comments
No.. we do not pray as a couple. When I do my praying at night my husband is in the bed with me. So, it may not be as hard as you or I think. I think these 5 tips for a marathon marriage are great. However I think the key to a successful marriage is COMMUNICATION. Its really as simple as that. Even though we have been married for about a year, I have learned that being open and honest while communicating is important. When people hold things inside and bury them away it is very damaging. Speak your mind and let your soon-to-be husband know how you feel without him having to guess. And pray...God always listens!!
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