In working for a major school district around the Houston area there is opportunity for me to see some of the trends of adolescences within certain schools. One outcome of a particular trend is that certain schools have day care children centers for the children of the children in the school. Obviously, pregnancy is one of the results of adolescence students having sexual relations. Yet, what are some of the other damaging consequences when individuals are promiscuous, including adults.
For one thing, promiscuity destroys your discernment skills and causes an emotional revolt to occur in our soul. As a result, love is based on our emotion, affection and visual attraction, which are nothing more than values that are based on sensation. When your values are based on sensation not only do you seek gratification in the area of sex, but also in drugs, and excessive alcohol. These are all forms of physical stimulation, not happiness! As a result, there is also depression, self-pity and even suicide.
Today, people seem to forget that we have a soul and not just a body. Virtue always emphasizes the soul. There has to be a unity of souls first and this is why God calls for virtue, not sensation! Men and women of virtue will always emphasize the soul and not the body. Emphasis on the body prevents you from ever entering the compatibility and rapport stages of romance. After the attraction stage comes the compatibility stage, in the sense that you are both a born-again believer and both live by virtue, not by sensation. This is what Second Corinthians 6:14 is referring to with the command to not be unequally yoked.
Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness? (KJV 2 Cor. 6:14)
Once the compatibility stage has been determined, then you allow for the rapport or relationship stage. This is when a relationship is established, when souls are harmonized. This is the basis for building a marriage on virtue love, and the reason that Hebrews 13:4 states that sex outside of marriage is forbidden. This is also why Ephesians 5:3 states fornication should not be part of a believer’s life.
But fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints. (KJV Eph. 5:3)
Therefore, we will do well to remember that a man of virtue will never take a lady past her own volition in the area of intimacy. Likewise, a woman of virtue should not respond to some man’s sexual advances; this is not the right man for you. Remember that being motivated by your libido does not have any virtue at all because it has no conscience, no stability, nor is it rational. Personal love without virtue is unstable and creates a tremendous amount of problems.
Contrary to popular belief, abstinence is a virtuous thing because it protects you from soul damage and from body damage as well. For one thing, it closes the door on ever entering the compatibility and rapport stages of a relationship. Premarital sex abandons the virtue that is necessary for true compatibility and a soul relationship, and also causes the fornicators to base the relationship on either romance or just plain lust, in a state of deceit. A relationship should never be based on sex or on emotion. We can get emotional from watching a movie or seeing an exciting sports event, or hearing a particular song, but it is nothing more than emotion, which is not to be confused with love. Premarital sex handicaps you from ever being the right person for marriage, simply because there is no understanding of genuine love, which is not a sensation.
Premarital sex also causes difficulty adjusting to one person in marriage, and it also contributes to a lack of sexual energy in marriage. This helps to explain the reason for so many dull marriages today as well as so many impotent men and frigid women. Not to mention the sexual diseases that can also result from promiscuity. Just because everybody is doing something in the movies, on television, at school, or on the job does not make it right. Small wonder our divorce rate has soared to at least 50% and is steadily escalating. We have become a society living on sensation rather than on virtue.
Today, sexual intimacy is portrayed as a normal healthy function of life, and it is, but only within marriage. God has designed sexual intimacy for one right man and one right woman in marriage as a beautiful reflection of Jesus Christ and His Church. Sexual restraint might seem impossible in our day and age, but it is entirely possible for the child of God who walks in virtue love. There are so many loser believers when it comes to the area of sexual restraint and, because they lack virtue, they are under the curse of First Corinthians 16:22. They are born-again believers destined for heaven, but will spend their life here on earth living by the curse of their impulses. This is a sad thing when you consider all the wonderful spiritual assets that the Lord has made available to every believer in the Church Age. Yet, many miss out on God’s grace provisions because they have wrong priorities. Most believers never learn and understand what they have available in Christ because they simply allow the details of life to take precedence over their relationship with the Lord.
We are called to base our motivation on our personal love for God the Father and God the Son. This is what will insulate us against mental attitude sins and give us a life of virtue. We can get to the point in our life where we base our decisions simply on whether it is the right and honorable thing to do. Not only do we know it is right, but we also understand why it is right, as in the case of avoiding premarital sexual activity (2Cor. 5:14).
For the love of Christ constraineth us; because we thus judge, that if One died for all, then were all dead. (KJV 2Cor. 5:14)
The word “constraineth” in this verse is translated from the Greek verb synechei, which means, to surround, to control, to hold prisoner or to rule. This is the love that gives us the proper motivation to be overcomers. It is this love for the Lord that is supposed to control or dominate our thinking. This is where we are supposed to derive our motivation. This is what gives virtue to our motivations. Otherwise, we will react to injustice and unfair treatment. In return, the reaction will cause a loss of wisdom, common sense and discernment.
Love for God the Son is supposed to emphasize our correct priorities and love for God the Father emphasizes our correct motivation, which is a vital part of the Christian life. True motivation is supposed to come from the Lord and not from our impulses or from people. Again, this is what gives virtue to our motivations, and virtuous motivations is what is greatly needed in our society today.
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