India astrologers get solar eclipse dead wrong

In yet another example of primitive superstitions that manage to survive in the present day, astrologers in India predicted much doom and gloom for yesterday because of the solar eclipse:

Indian astrologers are predicting violence and turmoil across the world as a result of this week’s total solar eclipse, which the superstitious and religious view as a sign of potential doom.

Oh no! The moon has briefly blocked our view of the sun! This sort of thing never happens ever! We’re doomed! DOOMED!!!!

And of course nothing out of the usual happened. In fact, it's almost like nothing much happened yesterday, period. There are anti-vaccinationists that aren’t even this stupid. These guys need to stop watching Heroes as if its a documentary. Solar eclipses don’t have supernatural powers. Maybe we should change Groundhog Day to Stupid Indian Astrologer Day. If they get scared by their own shadow, it means another Dark Ages.

Of course, typically what happens in these situations is that those who made the bad predictions will insist some sort of massive prayer or what have you prevented the bad things from happening or the particularly bold will insist that they got it right and that the bad stuff DID happen. And they'll point to one or two bad things that happened that we've come to expect happens all the time anyway and it will only seem to be an impressive validation of the prediction to those who have already swallowed the Kool-Aid.

But this astrological prediction stuff gets better:

In Hindu mythology, the two demons Rahu and Ketu are said to “swallow” the sun during eclipses, snuffing out its life-giving light and causing food to become inedible and water undrinkable.

Pregnant women are advised to stay indoors to prevent their babies developing birth defects, while prayers, fasting and ritual bathing, particularly in holy rivers, are encouraged.

Demons! Why’s it always got to be demons? Oh no! Protect the pregnant women from the shadow of the moon!!! The last thing I want to hear when I call for tech support is hearing some moron telling me my computer isn’t working because the demons that ate the sun have used their voodoo on my operating system.

Fortunately, my favorite Indian, Sanal Edamaruku, president of the Indian Rationalist Association, is on the case. You might remember Sanal as the guy who volunteered to have some voodoo guy kill him on live, national television with nothing but magic spells. Suffice it to say, he’s still very much alive.

Sanal Edamaruku, president of the Indian Rationalist Association, dismissed such doomsday predictions.

“Primarily, what we see with all these soothsayers and astrologers is that they’re looking for opportunities to enhance their business with predictions of danger and calamity,” he told AFP.

“They have been very powerful in India but over the last decade they have been in systematic decline.”

Keep fighting the crazy over there, Sanal. We’re counting on you.