“A healthy social life is found only, when in the mirror of each soul the whole community finds its reflection, and when in the whole community the virtue of each one is living.” That quote was created by Rudolf Steiner, an Austrian philosopher.
Having a social life is important. By nature human are social beings, which is why it is believed that only humans have a sophisticated language. Having a social life does not mean going out every other night to various parties or events. Having a social life means having quality relationships with people that are of great importance to you.
The following article was intended to be read after the two previous articles. This article is part three of the You Need a Reality Check series. To read the first article please click here and to read the second click here.
Maslow’s third level of need is the social need. Social needs are important because one of the greatest aspects of life is to feel loved and accepted by others or psychological and physiological disorders are likely to occur. There are three groups of social relationships. The three groups are friends and family, romantic relationships and community.
The friends and family social group is put together for the purpose of belonging. The first thing that needs to be addressed is that family doesn't always mean to be related by blood. Family is more of a metaphor of the close and unbreakable bond shared with another person. Your best friend has a different place in your heart than your distant cousin you know only through facebook. In this social group it’s important to stress quality over quantity. You may have as many friends and family as you want but it’s pointless to use these names unless the quality of the relationships you share is worthwhile.
The second type of social group is the romantic relationships. The most important key to a successful romantic relationship is to learn the difference between need and want. You don’t need anyone to love you, care for you or think you’re attractive but yourself. You may want someone to do this for you but let that person be an accessory to relationship with yourself. When the time comes that a person may not be a sufficient part of your life, you need to move on. Many people lose themselves and form an identity with their partner. When you’re no longer growing, being challenged and respected you need to walk away. Keep in mind that everyone you meet is either a lesson or a blessing.
Lastly, the third type of social group is the community. This may be your religious group, co-workers, neighborhood, school friends, or the group that share an interest. The goal of this social group is to find your people. Find like-minded people that will lift you higher and will have your back if anything goes wrong. People from this community group may become part of your romantic relationship group or your family and friends group. These people are here to allow you to have a source of belonging tied to a hobby, belief or a skill.
The main focus of having your social needs met is to avoid things such as loneliness, depression, anxiety, mental illness and physical illness. If at any time anyone from these social groups is making you feel unhappy and disrespected you have a right to leave them. Don’t ever feel bad for cutting negative people out of your life.