The territorial spirit of your marriage will rear it's ugly head when your kids are born. You see, from the second you have a child you and your spouse are locked in a contest to see who is the number one parent. What will the baby's first word be? Mama or Dada? Do they look more like mom or more like dad? Who's side of the family do they closer relate with? And because we only have one child, it's especially challenging. We can't exactly split our son in half (although we've thought about it). You stand firm on your belief that anything that grows in your body for nine months, makes you fat and then makes it's entrance in a pretty uncomfortable way is absolutely yours to keep. So when your husband lovingly addresses you as the mother of his child (thinking you should be flattered), he is shocked when you want to flatten him!
Dads are at a biological disadvantage, you'll admit that. But let's be honest, if men could carry babies would they? Surprisingly, when you put a few men to this question conducting an informal survey for this article, they answered yes-they'd gladly carry a child if nature permitted. And you've encountered a few single dads who love and raise their kids so you can believe that that sentiment is genuine.
However, the 'mommy's or daddy's?' debate is never really resolved. When your son wants to go to a movie with you, dad feels he's being left out. But when that same son wants to go to a football game with dad for 'guys only' time, you feel bereft. Yes, as a family we have our activities together but finding accord is tough. Being the only woman in the house stinks at times because you must constantly stand your ground to prevent them ganging up on you! At times I wish we'd had more children but when you consider others who struggle to conceive and would be delighted to have even one child you know you're blessed.
The saying goes that having a child is as if your heart is walking outside your body. And when you really listen, the times you hear your thoughts coming out of your child's mouth are truly rewarding. If they are the right thoughts, that is. I don't know about you but there have been occasions my child has embarrassed me by repeating words or expressing thoughts I should never have voiced. But that's allright too, because I know that means he's listening so I shape up. And the good part about being married is if your darling son really goes out of line, you can just blame it on his dad. Just be prepared because he'll return the favor to you next time. So the best we can do is each do our part to raise a responsible citizen. Then we both deserve the credit.