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Winter makes me polar: Just barely

Winter is here or so the theory of reporting news as it happens goes. I'm old school so I believe in reporting news as it goes on. That's traditional in many generations of my family and circle of friends, who most of which but not all, are college educated: that's not to say my non-college friends are stupid.

Women's ice hockey powers preps for Sochi
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They don't have dropsies like Stephen Colbert because they didn't go to Princeton University. My friends do recognize buffoonery as in Colbert's schtick when they see it. I could do some NSA surveillance jokes right now but Comedy Central via Colbert will be obligated to drop it like practicing Jews have to drop the ham at the grocery store. Colbert thinks kosher ham jokes are endlessly funny and full of demographic gold bags. Those typically distracted kids he talks to are likely to keep taking those Ritalin-like drugs with schtick like that.

That is a tragedy.

The weather is on my mind but as I mentioned in my title just barely because we can't find a grownup male to do competent schtick on television about news and happenings. Maybe we in fact really need less schtick because it turns into child abuse and adult abuse on us the viewers. The weather today is polar but the mental chill from Colbert is chilly in July.

MSNBC has polar sensibilities and ironically it comes right around Hanukkah and Christmas when cold reminds us of the warmth and kindness of those very special holidays.

Here we are in an Olympic year and it's a Winter Olympics so we have cold, cold thoughts from Sochi and all everyone can think of is Russia because no one ever knew where it was until recently. It's cold there and our round-the-clock television folks are aloof. We have downhill champions on NBC and its spawn.

The honest voices on NBC Sports are the actual athletes and coaches who walked the walk and competed and coached in these winter sports. On MSNBC the downhill champions are lawyers who are aware that going downhill enables yet more lawyers (and shrinks) to do out-of-control, runaway train stories. Those two contrary groups are from the same birth believe it or not.

Slalom--that's a funny word--is a must-watch event in the Olympics. So then, of course, we can say it's all downhill from here. Almost all of the Olympics--the Winter Olympics in Sochi--is downhill.

Precious downhill people sliding down that slippery slope into lawyer-speak rhetoric are the parallel shadow-voice of the meat and potatoes folks at NBC Sports. Ad hominem attacks that might be nothing more than a refusal or inability to pass a baton on to a more appropriately engaged announcer might be a reason for a downhill slide by those anonymous and self-appointed lovers of chit chat. Who can really say?

Batons as we know aren't warm and fuzzy in the sub-freezing winter landscapes. And, as far as I know, there are no batons in winter sports. There's a dilemma for a young shadow-brother (MSNBC) trying to bleed--but positively--on its audience of sports and life lovers.

I don't bleed positively. Do you?

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