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Wii U officially a flop, gamers rejoice

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In the biggest understatement of the decade, Nintendo announced that the Wii U has failed to meet their sales expectations of 9 million by the end of March of this year. How much did they miss by? Nintendo reduced the sales forecast to 2.8 million.

The Wii U came out in November of 2012. The PS4 and Xbox One came out a full year later and have sold 4.2 million and 3 million, respectively. Proud (read: delusional) Wii U owners will remain defiant to the bitter end.

Depending on which pro-Nintendo website you visit, Wii U owners will either tell you that the entire world is conspiring against the Wii U and lying about the Wii U's sales figures, or that the Wii U's abysmal sales are actually evidence that the Wii U is dominating the Xbox One and PS4.

It's precisely this kind of attitude from Nintendo that caused the Wii U to flop. Nintendo refuses to acknowledge the fact that gamers who loved Mario back in the 80's have all grown up and moved on to games like Gears of War and GTA. We no longer want to stomp on mushrooms who kidnapped an overweight princess. We want to curb stomp aliens who all but wiped out the entire human race.

Nintendo put all its money on the Wii U's touchscreen controller and insist that the next step in the evolution of gaming lies in gimmicky controls. Nintendo forces its game developers to create games that will make use of their special controller just so they could say that they have a game that's only possible on the Wii U.

Here's some good advice for Nintendo. The LAST thing gamers want to think about is the controller in their hands. Nintendo believes that every single Wii U game ought to constantly remind players of how wonderful their controller is.

So why should gamers celebrate the demise of the Wii U? Plain and simple, the success of the Wii U would've meant the end of video games as we know it. It would've meant that we will no longer enjoy chainsawing aliens or speeding on raceways in cars with true-to-life handling. Instead we would be wagging sticks and shaking our hips at the screen while carrying a mini-TV in our hands. No, thank you. Thank you, Nintendo, for being too caught up in fantasyland to succeed.

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