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Why doesn't my spouse listen?

You know you want to listen.

A committed relationship depends on the defining and analysis of bids between two partners of a couple. Basically, each partner puts forth a certain number of bids for attention from the other partner. The second partner may respond positively, negatively, or not at all. The latter two responses have deep negative effects on the bond between a couple.

If there are very few bids, it's impossible to improve their quality. If one partner is unwilling to participate, the other may feel more hopelessness, disappointment, and frustration.

The system is truly set up for couples who are both wiling and ready to work. It would be incredibly difficult to implement such a method with two people who are not on the same page. Building friendship between partners can help alleviate marital problems.

The strengths of this method comes from the easy instructions and direct expectations. Many of these points are simply common sense. It seems so easy to say "try to better friends with your wife and your problems will go away". Too often people stop getting to know each other once they are married and this creates a lack of interest in each other as well as a sense of entitlement. People take each other for granted.

Starting now, stop and listen to what your partner is saying. It may be so simple, yet fulfilling to answer each other's bids positively.  More ways to use bids more productively coming your way soon!




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