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Why do Christians choose fear when they are graced to courage?

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Why do we embrace fear when we are given overwhelming grace to be courageous?

"There is no fear in love,
but perfect love drives out fear
because fear has to do with punishment,
and so one who fears is not yet perfect in love
." 1 John 4:11-18

We fear because we do not love perfectly. We do not love perfectly because we are still reliant on the broken crutch of sin for our stability in an unstable world. Because we rely on a broken crutch for our stability, we wobble through life half broken. We fear because we are wounded and we cannot grasp the reality of God's power to convert our wounds into our glorified strengths through the power of His Cross.

We fear, we don't fully trust, and we continue to wobble through life, weak and lost.

"For he shall rescue the poor when he cries out,
and the afflicted when he has no one to help him.
He shall have pity for the lowly and the poor;
the lives of the poor he shall save
." Psalm 72:1-2, 10, 12-13

As pathetic as we wobble through life, we are still too proud to admit that we are a spiritual wreck. Only in the tragic, sad, and pathetic self realization of the mess we have become can we start to see that there really is only one Way out of the hell-bound-death-spiral we have wobbled into. But the good news is that that realization comes from the grace of God--and the good news is that we can instantly receive God's Love with one cry of poverty--and the further good news is that God can turn our mess into the fuel of evangelization for fellow wobblers.

"But at once he spoke with them,
'Take courage, it is I, do not be afraid!'
He got into the boat with them and the wind died down.
They were completely astounded.
They had not understood the incident of the loaves.
On the contrary, their hearts were hardened
." Mark 6:45-52

Though we confess on Saturday, and receive Jesus on Sunday, we struggle by Monday! Sometimes we can only understand the Eucharistic Jesus in all His Merciful Cross-born grace when He is the only viable option in our self-imposed crisis. Maybe we can only understand the Paschal Mystery, the Sacrifice of the Mass, and Divine Mercy when we are on the cross ourselves--poor, destitute, and in need of a Savior.

I've been there…recently. Praying, God always answers. How about you?