You love the effects of your yoga during, and after, your practice. And, although you know this, and have picked up on the pattern, there is a teeny voice inside that tries to nudge you out of your decision to start a set, or go to a class. This is the same voice that gives an inner sigh every time you get yourself to a class or when a particular posture is called out. If this sounds familiar, do you ever wonder why, even though you know how good this work makes you feel, you still have to drag-convince-force yourself to get going?
The ego likes what it can control and likes to keep you in check. In your old fears and habits, this is easy to accomplish as opposed to attempting to make a change and flourish. In some strange way, feeling bad about a non-beneficial pattern feels safer and more comfortable than going the distance and doing the work to improve your situation or change a pattern. You would think that improving would feel better than sulking, but misery is an old friend that does not want to be forgotten. It is fueled by your ego and the ego would rather chirp those questions of “do you really think a yoga class will fix your problems?” and “don’t you have other things you need to get done now?” in order to keep the toxic thought pattern in full swing.
If this sounds like something you may be encountering, go to a class, or lay your mat out at home, in spite of that voice. When a troubling posture or challenging meditation come up, immediately catch the negative sensation and instead put on a smile on your face and embrace what the posture or meditation have to teach you. Use the time to excavate why this particular asana, or meditation, has this effect on you.
Keep in mind that the work you learn and develop during your yogic practice is not a one-stop shop. The effects do not cease once you wrap up your session. They, and the lessons that build, linger and permeate your space and soul with realizations, ripple effects, and a-ha moments. This is the light we seek when integrating yoga into our lives. It is an on-going practice that keeps on processing in the background even if we might be unaware that anything is happening.