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When promises turn in to false hope

Don't trust words, trust the actions behind those words.
Don't trust words, trust the actions behind those words.

Is there a person that you like that claims he/she likes you back? Have you two been promising you’ll be together someday? Is there something preventing the two of you from being together whether it is a current relationship, family, friends, or distance? When two people really like each other there shouldn’t be anything too powerful to stand in the way. This is not to say that parents don’t have the right to stop you from seeing one another, but you could always sit your parents down with the person you like so you can come up with a compromise.

Depending on the situation, it could be difficult determining whether you are being given false hope or an actual promise. A current relationship, family, friends and distance are some of the most common reasons that would prevent two people from being together.

If the person you like, or even if you yourself is in a current relationship then shouldn’t you end it? You cannot go on being with someone while wanting to be with someone else. If you have lost all feelings for the person you are with then you should end it before it gets worse. The sooner you end it the better off everything will be.

But what if the person you like is in a relationship? Do they constantly give you the false hope that they’re going to leave the one they’re with for you? Remember that actions speak louder than words. Talk can be cheap, especially when it comes to promises. If they have been “promising” for weeks upon weeks that they are going to leave their current relationship, chances are they just don’t want to lose both of you. There is a possibility that they want to keep you around until the one they’re with leaves them.

In this situation, you are known as a back-up plan and ultimately leaves you with false hope. The person you like just doesn’t want to be alone so they are keeping you around until things go south with their significant other. One sign that will help you look for this is if they constantly say they are going to leave the person but they don’t. This could also mean that they still have feelings for that person. If this is so then there is a possibility you could be a rebound after everything is said and done.

Another sign you are being given false hope is if they don’t talk to you much, especially about the situation. Sometimes they will do this but to keep you around they will talk to you once in a while saying sweet things to get you to hold on. This is a dirty trick that many people do just to get their way, especially if they know the person would do anything for them.

If the reason the two of you aren’t together is because of family issues, just sit everyone down and talk. If your parents are forbidding you to see this person then there is a chance they know something you don’t. Ask your parents or have them ask theirs if they are willing to sit down and maybe come up with a compromise.

Do your friends not accept the one you like or vice versa? It is true that sometimes your best friend or close friends know what is good for you. Simply talk to them about it and ask them why they disapprove. Explain to them everything you see that they don’t. Be sure to take their point of view in to consideration because there might be a reason they disapprove. But if these people are just your friends and are disapproving because they don’t like the person then their opinion shouldn’t matter.

It can be difficult to be with someone when there is distance blocking the two of you from physically being together. Watch out if they are constantly telling you “we’ll be together soon”. It is true that it takes money to travel but if they are going on about being together for months then you may need to open your eyes. You could check to see what their reaction would be to you going to visit.

You could simply tell them “well I saved up some money and I already booked my ticket to come see you.” Take note as to what their reaction is and how excited they seem. Instead of pretending you could also book a ticket and just surprise them. Be careful if you do this however, especially if you don’t know them personally. It is advised that if you don’t know them personally then you should bring a friend or family member with you. If they truly want to see you, they’ll show at least some excitement.

Until the two of you are officially together in a relationship, keep your heart on guard. Don’t give them your all if they aren’t willing to do the same and don't fall in to the false hope trap. Remember that words mean nothing when no actions are being taken.

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