As I sit here in my office today waiting for surgery I am not anxious at all, at least not for now. I do not like needles and IV's which I know are very necessary to help the doctors do their job, however; I am at peace and I know that my rotor cuff and bicepital tendon have to be repaired and I am in good hands. I’m I worried not at all.
I think where people have a tendency to worry is when things are out of their control, and if they can't control the actions others, they worry even more. For example, in divorce court, some may worry about mischaracterizations their ex-spouse and attorney may say about them. Many clients over the years who have gone through a divorce found themselves extremely worried about everything involved with their divorce and being in court. Most of their concerns were unfounded.
Another example is how we worry about our children and how they will turn out. I sure do as a father! I want my daughter to be a great asset to her faith and to the community she lives in. I want her to excel in her marriage and be a fantastic wife. Can I control any of this? No, not at all. I can only pray for the successes in her young life. I have laid out the foundation for her to follow and pray that she does! So my question is, what worries you from day to day? Are your worries real or imagined? How can you deal with everyday worries so they don't consume you? For me that is a simple answer, I just don't let unreasonable thoughts control me. I look at the encouraging counter thoughts. I believe that finding ways to counter my worries has helped me a great deal.
When I start worrying about my daughter I counter my thought with the fact that she's in God’s hands! That helps a great deal. If you think about it, what will my worrying do to help my daughter? Not a thing! So, I will not panic and I will trust God and let him take care of business.
My tips for dealing with people that worry:
- 90% of the things we worry about never happen.
- Focus on resolution and not despair.
- Have a plan that will help you through your worrying.
- Plan to speak to those who make you worry and tell them why.
- If you have a teen that's learning to drive and taking the car for the first time, tell them to be cautious.
- If you have a relationship that causes you to worry, go to that person and try to repair and make amends.
- Figure out if the worries you have are real or imagined.
These tips work! Try them! Remember that worrying just causes you frustrations that you don't need to live with. Do you worry out of control? Do you want to stop worrying and need help? Are you worried about your marriage and need help in deciding what to do? If you answered yes to any of these questions call Dr. Mike he can help you!