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What do humans care about? August 5th edition

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While President Barack Obama’s healthcare plan is dominating the political landscape, lets check in and see what the top 20 searches on Google are for today:

1.            george sodini

Who? What? Oh this would be the guy that shot up the LA Fitness in Pittsburgh.  I have an LA Fitness membership and the reason that I haven’t gone in months and gained all that weight is because I feared a gym shooting.  Whew glad that’s over with. But in all seriousness. I hope this is not a new trend on the horizon.

2.            scoot coupe

Now this thing is way cool. Its like a scooter car that goes 70mph.  I don’t know where to drive this to, but whatever its awesome.

3.            steve bing

President Bill Clinton’s BFF who let Clinton borrow his jet to rescue two smoking hot Asian reporters from North Korea. Glad to see that people care more about the dude who owns the plane than the women rescued.

4.            sodini blog

The blog of the LA Fitness killer has been taken down, but plenty of news reports show a lonely man, who it seems over time grew a strong disdain for women.  Good thing I have a strong disdain for all people. I don’t discriminate.

5.            lunar eclipse august 5 2009

No moon…where did you go? Oh ok there you are. Hopefully unlike the solar eclipse that happened in Africa recently where scared people ran into their huts because they thought it was the apocolypse everyone will chill out.

6.            gym shooter

Looks like this story went International. Except I am sure a lot of people in third worlds are asking themselves, why Americans refuse to do hard labor as their job, but will spend money to go to a place to do hard lifting? The joys of capitalism.

7.            health club shooting

8.            jody billingsley

One of the women killed during Sodini’s killing spree. She was 38-years-old. The above link is to her artwork.

9.            lee ann valdiserri

The estranged mother of Sodini’s child.  Possibly dead? This will be an interesting fact in the puzzle of this scary psycotic man.

10.            iain clayton

The cute husband of Laura Ling, one of the journalists rescued from North Korea. Again, glad to see that people care more about the attractive husband. Got to love it.

11.            k l gates

The seventh largest international law firm won an award as the best firm of the year. Gues who started this bad boy? Bill Gates Sr.  Seriously? Your son is the richest man in the world and you own a top 10 international law firm. This just proves its all about the genes.

12.            laura ling wikipedia

Finally! In my opinion, this is the most important story of the day. A former President travels to a communist country we have no relationship with, and just rolls in and takes back two prisoners. Can you imagine the look on Laura’s face when she is being hauled out of prison into a secret meeting and Bill Clinton is standing there. You would have to think that this is a dream.

13.            eli manning

New York Giants quarterback who just signed a 6 year $97 million deal.  It just goes to show you that the recession is a fraud.  Rich people are not in a recession. Only us stupid schmucks who have a year round job for a living.

14.            heidi overmier

Another victim from the shooting rampage, this time a 46-year-old mother.

15.            edgar sawtelle

A novel by David Wroblewski, which was featured as one of Oprah’s book selections. A novel about heartland America, dogs and the human heart.

16.            paula abdul quits american idol

So she says on Twitter, which is becoming the newest trusted news source. I think it’s a publicity stunt. She might even make a return appearance maybe one or two weeks in. What do you think?

17.            auschwitz syndrome

This is a keyword designed to attract people to click on it and get a virus on their computer. Its also a scary disease, but all the top-rated google websites are virus sights. Be careful.

18.            freed journalists

19.            michael saldate

He’s an actor but also the husband of Euna Lee, the other reporter who returned home from North Korea today.  I think there are a lot of lonely women out there trying to get into contact with the two husbands of the formerly imprisoned journalists, you know just to offer comfort and all.

20. elizabeth gannon pittsburgh

Yet another victim from the Pittsburgh shootings.

 

What did we learn?

-People are incredibly fascinated by this shooting in PA, probably because so many of us go to the gym and now there is going to be a mass panic on exercising, just like there is whenever a mall shooting occurs.

-The most important story in my opinion, A former President rescuing two ordinary citizens from the grasp of Kim Jong Ill, is not getting a not of play. People care more about the husbands than the actual rescue.

- How long will we have to deal with the Paula Abdul American Idol fallout?

-Nobody likes to capitalize anymore

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