"If Only. These must be the two saddest words in the world". ~ Mercedes Lackey
'If Only I had...", "If Only I hadn't...", "If Only I Knew..." Sentences that begin like this cause many people constant mental and emotional turmoil. These are the statements that illustrate an action or inaction that a person regrets. Regret is usually the emotion that follows a decision that you are apologetic about. Different from disappointment, which is when a 'good' decision goes 'bad'. Regret is not only based on the result, but also on the decision itself. While it is not possible to live without disappointments, as you can not foresee the future, it is possible to live a life without regrets.
Think back on 2010, are there any relationships that you have damaged, that you now regret? Were there opportunities placed before you that you turned down due to fear, that constantly leave you wondering - 'what if'? Are there situations that you have chosen to tolerate longer than necessary, that have left you drained and you now regret not being more aggressive earlier? Is there something that you need to express to someone that you have not and you now regret it because they are gone, or they have suffered unnecesary consequences as a a result? What are the things you wanted to do or not do in 2010 - that are now mental and emotional burdens of regret?
Once you have gathered those decisions, determine what blocked you from taking the more desirable action? Was it fear? passivity? living for others? Denial, etc.? You can not reverse past decisions, however, you can work towards living a life without regret by either eliminating or managing the obstacles that hampered your ability to make a decision you respect vs regret. As you plan for 2011, make intentional plans to manage the impact of these obstacles in your life.
~ Until Next Time
"One's real life is often the life that one does not lead" - Oscar Wilde
On the road to a WHOLE New You. You ARE Intentional.