Well, the McDonald’s Happy Meal is back in the news and I don’t know about you but I’m lovin’ it.
Since its introduction in 1979, and over 45 trillion calories later, the over-salted and brightly colored Happy Meal boxes made out of recycled paper have been ordered at a clip of 2.5 million each year. The classic cheeseburger with fries and a Coke currently top out at 530 calories with 23 grams of fat and 61 grams of carbs. After 34 years of burgers, toys and countless warnings of choking hazards, McDonald’s is tweaking Ronald McDonald’s colorful box of goodies with yet another change.
As a veteran consumer of the Happy Meal, often ordered with a side of extra-large fries and a double quarter pounder with cheese, I think this change may have some merit, but with a few pitfalls.
McDonald’s in the United Kingdom is looking to replace Spiderman or Pirates of the Caribbean toys with books. That’s right, you heard me, books! I like to read, but the main reason I order a Happy Meal is because of the toy. The thinking is not only do they avoid the choking hazard but it may very well give a boost the child literacy rate. The kid may be fat, but at least he can read. What kid chokes on a book? It’s a win-win situation for the Golden Arches.
Child obesity is a major problem around the globe. I blame the parents. Stop letting your kid eat fast-food. Diet Coke or any other kind of soda does not help. Get out the size twelve shoe, kick your kid in the ass and make them get off the couch and go outside and shoot baskets or rake leaves. Destroy the video games, make them read a book.
Maybe it’s time for some new laws. Happy Meals sold only to people over the age of 21 with proper identification and a picture ID required.
The days of the classic cheeseburger, high-sodium fries and plastic wrapped promotional toy with a Coke may be coming to an end. Maybe this book giveaway may work, as long as the reading is light. Or maybe the Happy Meal itself will all but disappear.
That would be a sad day for me, replacing 530 calories in a classic cheeseburger with a Big Mac loaded with 550 calories and 970mg of sodium. And I’d be out the toy as well!
C’mon McDonald’s, I deserve a break today.
Have a happy meal day everybody.
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