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Wanted Kid: Extrovert or introvert

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According to Susan Cain, author of Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking (2013), society lives with a value system called the “Extrovert Ideal—the omni-present belief that the ideal self is gregarious, alpha, and comfortable in the spotlight.” Although, extroversion is an appealing personality style, “one personality isn’t better than the other”; introversion and extroversion simply differ. (, 2013)

According to Carl Jung’s Psychological Types, “introverts are drawn to the inner world of thought and feeling.” Additionally, introverts focus on the meaning they derive from events occurring around them, and they “recharge their batteries” by having some alone time.

Introvert is not synonymous with hermit. The distinctions are not always clear-cut. There can be a bit of both in your child’s personality although some characteristics may lean slightly in one direction.

According to, the following are characteristics of an extrovert: Extroverts find pleasure in interacting with others and make friends easily.

Extroverts join teams and clubs that keep them active and often enjoy being the center of attention at social events. They get into trouble more often than introverts as well.

If your child is an extrovert that doesn’t mean they are “wild, broken or out of control, [he or she is] just made to channel and harness energy [so] don’t be afraid to embrace and encourage that.” (, 2013)

“If your children are quiet, help them make peace with new situations and new people, but otherwise let them be themselves.” (Cain, 2013, p. 265)

The key message is to be accepting of whichever personality type your child has.


Cain, S. (2013). Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking. (p. 1-12, 265) (2013, October 16). 10 Signs Your Child in an Extrovert.



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