Miley Cyrus twerked mercilessly all over the VMA's on Sunday night (August 25), and we are among the throngs of MTV viewers who are now scarred for life for having seen her do it. Lucky for us, we had the TV screen and two thousand miles between our actual eyeballs and the things Miley Cyrus did at the Barclays Center in Brooklyn as a buffer.
Will Smith and his family were not so lucky.
The collective Smith family reaction to witnessing the event live and in the flesh is so priceless, so spot-on, that a photo of the Hollywood clan has gone viral in the hours since the MTV Video Music Awards 2013. (See photo here above of Will Smith and his family watching Miley.)
Miley Cyrus Twerks, Humps Things During VMA 2013 Act: Scares Will Smith's Children, Entire Nation
Giant, drugged-looking dancing bears joined Miley onstage for her hit "song" called "We Can't Stop", an ode to ecstasy and bad grammar and oh, also ecstasy. The only thing more obnoxious than the song itself would have to be the music video, which Miley basically recreated at the VMA's on August. 25 in all its idiotic glory.
"After Earth" star Will Smith and his kids, son Jaden Smith and daughter Willow Smith, were among the most openly stunned and disturbed audience members caught on tape watching Miley twerk it out all over "Blurred Lines" singer (also, incidentally, a husband and father) Robin Thicke. Other notable observers included the members of One Direction, who looked bemused, bewildered and even bored watching Miley's wacky performance, along with Rihanna and her entourage, who seemed really high as they gazed on Hannah Montana-gone-Club-Kid, so this was probably either way less or way more traumatic for them than for us.
We have a feeling even Andy Warhol rolled over in his grave tonight. Sometimes bizarre for the sake of bizarre isn't innovative or interesting or cool; sometimes it's just what we see written all over Jaden Smith's face above: confusion and yes, a bit of fear. "Is this really what it takes to be famous? Is this what people want from entertainers?" the young actor must have wondered, looking from the former Disney starlet as she emerged from a giant robot teddy bear's groin and then humped its leg while channeling her inner Gene Simmons back to his own sister, an aspiring pop star and musician. (And, no, Jaden...to answer your questions, no. At least, we don't think so. We hope not. Probably. Yes. We're sorry, but it's better you find out now.)
All in all, Lady Gaga's set was really strange (a healthy mix of WTF? and yawn), Bruno Mars went on way too late in the show and there was a weird production energy throughout the entire telecast, but Miss Miley Cyrus gets our vote for Weirdest and Most Unnecessary VMA 2013 Act. Do you agree? What did you think of Miley's act? Leave your comments below now!
(Side note: Kevin Hart's impromptu "second set" when producers were trying to fix that big shiny stage door halfway through the awards was a cringe-worthy close second, but it was the foam-finger and odd, nubby little pigtails that really sealed Miley's fate.)
Want more? Click the following link for brand new VMA 2013 red carpet photos, as well as best and worst dressed picks!