Many people wonder why relationships seem to lose that spark right before the (arguably) most romantic day of the year. While every relationship is unique, there is usually a common denominator in Valentine's Day breakups. It's pressure.
Valentine's Day holds more pressure than Christmas or a birthday because the gift to give is love. It's not a pair of socks or a pocketbook, it's something more - usually jewelery or flowers, a teddy bear or chocolates. These gifts don't have to be big and expensive, but they are supposed to mean something serious.
Though cliche, many women expect jewelery (read an engagement ring) on Valentine's Day. This puts enormous amounts of pressure on men who are only at the "teddy bear and flowers" stage. Nerves can also play a huge roll in V-Day breakups. Some people make Valentine's Day out to be more than just a Hallmark Holiday - they make it out to be the make or break of their relationship. "We have to plan something special for Valentine's Day," or "I need to think of something special to buy her" are common signs of taking things to a different level.
Some couples don't celebrate Valentine's Day at all which is another extreme. A simple nod to the day by way of a card should be enough for the serious relationship. No strain, no stress, no hurt feelings.
Bottom line - don't make Valentine's any bigger than it needs to be. Do something that makes you both happy without going above and beyond or stressing out. Don't expect engagement rings or surprises. Just be happy that you're celebrating Valentine's Day and not Singles Awareness Day.
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Boston tip: Don't buy roses on or around Valentine's Day. Most stores triple the prices of roses that are going to die in less than a week. Try places like Costco or BJ's for your best bargain on roses.
Comments
My hubby and I quit all the hooplah with V-Day years ago. It gets too hard to think of something special to buy every year. We go for dinner, give each other a card, and sometimes get a small (ie maybe $10) token gift. We'd rather go out for dinner and have quality time than have a ton of teddy bears, boxes of chocolates, lingerie/boxers!
I think the pressure that girls put on us guys is crazy. It's just another day.
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