Updated with video: Lindsay Lohan gets confetti thrown on her while on her way to jail (with video)

   Boo.  Hoo.

Well, after a crazy couple of weeks, it's finally happened: Lindsay Lohan has been taken into custody and will soon be enjoying life from the privacy of an 8X11 cell (at least, that's what we're going to go ahead and assume the dimensions of L.A's jail cells are; if they're smaller, well, that's just a bonus).  The most recent development in the Lindsay Lohan saga involved her newly-hired attorney, O.J. veteran Robert Shapiro, quitting on the actress just hours before she was due to appear in front of the presiding judge.  But now that the Mean Girls actress is behind bars, how long can we expect for her to be there?  Read on for the details, my gentle Examiner readers...

Mean Girls actress Lindsay Lohan appeared in court this morning for a date with a jail cell, and by all accounts it came and went with little fanfare.  After weeks of jumping from one lawyer to the next, complaining about her forthcoming home's no-smoking policy, and some truly epic attempts to get her punishment delayed and/or eradicated, Lindsay Lohan is now a guest of the state of California.  Here's what they're saying about Lohan's morning over on TMZ.com:

Revel (ed.note-- the Judge in this case) will order the actress to be taken into custody -- where she should be handcuffed inside the courtroom and taken to a holding cell at the courthouse.

It's most likely that Lindsay will have her SCRAM bracelet removed in her holding cell. After that, it's a trip to Lynwood Correctional Facility ... where she will be booked, fingerprinted and outfitted in her new jailhouse fashions.  After that -- Lindsay will begin her 90-day sentence ... but due to overcrowding, she'll most likely serve only 25% of her sentence ... 23 days.

TMZ.com's article was written just before the hearing took place, but what's most interesting about their writeup is that last sentence.  Let's quote/bold/italicize that one again, because I think it bears repeating:

Lindsay will begin her 90-day sentence ... but due to overcrowding, she'll most likely serve only 25% of her sentence ... 23 days.

Wait a minute.  For the past few weeks, Lohan's been doing everything in her power to avoid going into the clink, including jumping from one lawyer to another trying to find someone that would be as passionate about the idea of Lindsay-not-going-to-jail as she is.  She's left no stone unturned in her quest to avoid doing time, and after all that it turns out that she'll only be serving three weeks behind bars?  Seriously?

UPDATE:  Before we go on, allow me to update these shenanigans with what might be the greatest video you're going to see all day.  CNN.com was at the hearing this morning, and they managed to get footage of someone tossing a large handful of confetti on Lohan as she was entering the building.  It's basically the most satisfying instance of schadenfreude that you're going to see all day: 

And now, back to our originally-scheduled article:  Now, I'm no hardened criminal with years of "time" under my belt, but that seems a little ridiculous.  Besides the fact that Lohan will-- in all likelihood-- be given special consideration behind bars, there's the little matters of post-jail interviews and renewed public interest to consider.  Lohan stands to make a million dollars for her first post-hoosgow interview (as previously reported at Gawker.com), but that would assume that she actually spends a little time behind bars prior to a post-jail interview.   Furthermore, let's not forget that Lohan broke a series of laws to wind up in this predicament to begin with: doesn't 23 days in jail seem like a bargain when it comes to "paying one's debt to society"?  Were she not Lindsay Lohan, she'd probably be looking at many more months-- if not years-- behind bars.

Just yesterday, Lohan's latest attorney-- former O.J. Simpson defender Robert Shapiro-- quit on Lohan after she combated his specific request that she follow his every instruction.  "His every instruction" reportedly included that she accept the terms that Judge Revel laid out, including the 90-day jail sentence.  We can only assume that Lohan's lawyers-- who have years' worth of experience in matters like these-- would have known that the prison overcrowding issue would keep her out of jail for the full extent of that sentence.  At this point, one has to wonder if she'll even actually serve out that 23 days: didn't Paris Hilton get a free pass home when she decided jail wasn't to her liking a few years ago?  Celebrities: They're so not like us.  Final thought: Whatever happened to those contempt charges for Lohan having the words "F--k U" printed on her fingernails in court?  Anyone know what happened with that?

Stay tuned for updates on this situation (and you just know there's gonna be updates) as they become available, my precious snowflakes.  If you've got something that you want to add to all this, feel free to sound off in the comments section below.  If that's too much trouble, hit the "Subscribe" button up top to get all future Comedy Examiner articles delivered straight to your inbox, free of charge, the moment they're published.  Why, just look at all the fun you've been missing lately:

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(photos: top--radaronline.com, next--tmz.com, next--thesuperficial.com, bottom--radaronline.com)