Werewolves. Bigfoot. Santa. Miss America. Jason as the prettiest girl in Bon Temps. Eric as a primal sex magnet. And a baby armadillo named Felix.
"True Blood" is fun.
Check out my list of the top 20 quotes from Season 3 Episode 2: "Beautifully Broken." And when you get to number 4, be sure to do the Bill voice right in your head.
• 'True Blood' recap: Welcome back, Godric! Burn Lorena, burn
20. Sookie: “Did you just see someone here?”
Terry: “No, usually when I see things other people don’t it’s ‘cause I haven’t taken my medication and I—”
19. Godric [In Swedish?]: “A vampire is never at the mercy of his emotions. He dominates them.”
18. Tara: “I deserve some peace.”
Lafayette: “And I deserve to plan your f--king funeral?”
17. Terry to Arlene: “You sick? Because of my shrimp again?”
16. Sookie to Eric: “You’re not going to distract me while talking nasty.”
15. Cooter to Bill: “You’re about to get deader, dead a-s motherf--ker.”
14. Bill: “Cooter? [Laughs] Seriously?”
13. Ruby to Lafayette and Tara: “This is Jesus. He’s a Mexican, but he ain’t raped me yet.”
12. Jason: “Wow, all these reporters, they’re here for you? Is this ‘cause of Eggs?”
Andy: “No, it’s ‘cause of me winning the Miss America pageant.”
11. Sookie: “Mr. Northman, will you please come in?”
10. Lafayette to Lettie Mae: “You’re too busy praising Jesus to realize your daughter trying to move in with him permanently.”
9. Eric to Sookie as she cries: “Please don’t do that. It makes me feel disturbingly human.”
8. Pam to Jessica, explaining how she stops herself from killing a human as she drinks their blood: “I think about crying children with soggy diapers. Also maggots.”
7. Jason to Sookie, after she knees him in the groin: “God, my family junk!”
6. Eric to Sookie: “To have and to hold. To love and to cherish. To blah blah blah blah blah. Till death do you part. Doesn’t bother you that you’ll be the only one doing the dying?”
5. Andy: “You’re a good guy, Stackhouse. You’ve got a lot of heart. You’re prettier than most girls. If you just applied yourself right you could accomplish almost anything.”
4. Sookie: “Every sound I hear, every time the phone rings or I see a shadow in the corner of my eye, I think it’s Bill. I keep expecting him to come through the door and say [in Bill’s accent] Sookie.”
3. Terry to Arlene, reading off his list of reasons why she can trust him with her kids: “I found a baby armadillo by the side of the road and I nursed it and now it sleeps under my bed and his name is Felix.”
2. Eric, slowly advancing toward Sookie: “Oh I’m not leaving. You’re going to invite me in so I can protect you. Or have passionate primal sex with you. How ‘bout both?”
1. Jason: “There’s werewolves?”
Sookie: “Yes.”
Jason: “S--t. Bigfoot, is he real, too?”
Sookie: “I don’t know, I guess it’s possible.”
Jason: “Santa?”
Sookie: “Jason, focus!”
***
Add any quotes I missed in the comments and check out my "True Blood" archive here. Please and thank you!
Comments
"Excuse me, I must go drain the second course. Carlos! Bring me that Thai boy!"
What was that quote about how if you really wanna "f**k someone up tell them the truth? I was searching for it everywhere. Guess I'll have to watch it again. Anyway that was a good you should post it if you can. Thanks
Frankin: ..everything goes black and i wake-up surronded by boby parts..
Got something to say?
Examiner.com is looking for writers, photographers, and videographers to join the fastest growing group of local insiders. If you are interested in growing your online rep apply to be an Examiner today!