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Todd Akin Isn’t Sorry

Todd Akin
Todd Akin
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Hey Todd. This column just can’t stay away from you.

To recap. Todd Akin, a Congressman running for Senate in the crimson state of Missouri a few years back opined that women who are raped have a way of shutting down any pregnancy. Slight paraphrase, but you all know what he said.

Slight digression, the Tea Party candidate who defeated long-time Indiana Senator Richard Lugar in the GOP primary that summer also said something quite stupid about rape and he lost in the general election. And hey, Lugar’s name sounds like a gun.

So there are things that are even too idiotic for the GOP. Better be on your toes Louie Gohmert.

Back to topic.

Thus, Akin lost. His remarks are now considered one of the seminal salvos in the Republican war on women. (Yesterday's column parsed the ugly implication that those who conceived after forced sex, were not "legitimately" raped.)

Still a guy has to eat. So Akin rummaged around until he found a book deal and someone to write said book. Seriously, folks have heard how this man talks. He couldn’t actually string words together into sentences.

But what could he shovel into this book? He was stupid and blew an election he should have easily won? No. He was a serial rapist and none of his victims ever conceived? That pesky legal system.

He had to have a reveal. A hook as they say in the writing biz. So he decided to regret the regret.

Probably someone on the staff suggested two years ago that Akin run an ad apologizing for his remarks. Those campaign consultants. All they care about is winning. So Todd did not stand up for his ill-advised, non-scientific, misogynist words. Not our hero. There actually was such a commercial during the election. And Todd stated at the end that he approved the message.

All lies. LIES.

Todd has a book deal and now will stand tall.

“Stress,” he screams, “impedes conception.” He demands that people google this phenomenon.

Oh Todd. Sometimes when couples are trying to have a child, the amorphous condition known as stress can impede a pregnancy. Not always of course. And many factors contribute to fertilization or lack there of. This is why biology needs to be taught in schools. Even in Missouri.

But even though this is a shaky supposition, it cannot be inverted and said to be true.

Example: Speeding may lead to more traffic accidents. However, motorists who always obey the law, still have collisions.

Shame on you if you buy this book.