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Thunderstorm slam is more powerful than grand slams

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At approximately 6 p.m. on Sunday, May 11, 2014, thunderstorms again slammed into Chicago-land. (Chicago-land includes all of Cook County.) This thunderstorm was more powerful than grand slams.

A grand slam is where a baseball hitter hits a home run with three men (or women) on bases: first base, second base and third base. The grand slammer must run around the bases, being certain that he/she touches every one. After he/she touches home plate, the scorekeeper and/or scoreboard attendant should add four (not fore) to the score for the team to which the grand slammer belongs.

A grand slam certainly makes four men or women run. (Venusians and Ionians may not run from thunderstorms.) Chicago-land’s, most recent thunderstorm probably impelled thousands of Chicagoans run to get out of the rain.

Sunday’s thunderstorm was not enough to create moats around Chicago-land golf courses. News channels did not report that it was raining “elephants and hippopotami.” People who went outside during this storm did not see other people rowing boats.

Certainly, lightning flashed brightly enough to outshine Chicago city lights. Certainly, lightning illuminated watch dials and clock dials enough so that Chicagoans could mentally record the time. Certainly, lightning startled any golfers still playing golf.

Certainly, thunder boomed loudly enough to make cell phone conversations difficult. Certainly, thunder boomed loudly enough to make some television viewers miss commercials. Certainly, thunder boomed loudly enough to make some golfers miss putts or begin anew their backswings.

On Monday, May 12, 2014, in the afternoon, most Chicago-land golf courses appeared to have damp sand bunkers. The putting greens, fairways and teeing grounds were damp, but did not show any casual water. However, some cart paths on some golf courses still had puddles. (Grass and soil absorb rain, but cart paths’ asphalt and concrete evaporate rain.)

Other May slams are bridge slams and door slams. Usually, neither of these slams relate to golf. However . . . golfers who were crossing concrete or wooden bridges may have received bridge slams in the forms of sudden downpours. However . . . golfers who entered their cars may have gotten door slams when strong, thunderstorm gusts drove such doors into their legs.

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