The hardest relationships to leave (I think) are those where the person treats you well. There is no physical or mental abuse. As a matter of fact, the person is very encouraging and for the most part is accommodating. Still in your heart you know you deserve more. It is really hard when your children bring this to your attention. At least that is what I used to believe. Now I believe that it is a blessing that in my life I have taught my children, by example, what they should and should not accept in a relationship. So now they recognize what a good one looks like. I am happy that I have demonstrated to them that it is okay not to be in a relationship at all. I am happy that they have paid close attention to what I was doing and to what I was saying because actions speak louder than words. So when my daughter gave me advice, I was not too proud to listen to it. I was so proud because I realized that I had taught her well. There was sadness in having to end a relationship but the feeling was eased by the realization that I had done so many things right in raising my children that they were able to give that advice to me and I was able to accept it.
Dating and being a single parent sets up a different set of dynamics. None the less, it is imperative to abide by what is most important and that is your children. They are number one. It probably is wise not to even introduce that person into your children’s lives until you know that person will be hanging around for a long time. Secondly, no matter what your situation is with your new relationship, you still have to ensure that your children maintain a good relationship with the other parent or to the best of your ability, do not stand in the way of that relationship. Listen to the opinions of your children, even if you do not act on them. You can be accepting of whomever the other parent chooses to date also. You don’t have to share everything with your children but just enough to let them know that you are okay in the relationship. The most important thing to them - ultimately will be that you are happy and happiness comes in so many forms; the relationship you are in is just one aspect. It is eventually, up to the dating parent to decide if he or she will like to continue in the relationship. Listen to that inner voice because your children will be listening to theirs. Lastly, any person who abuses you, whether physically or mentally, is a "deal breaker" but also you must be the one who lives with your choices and your life but if you allow a man or a woman to lie, to cheat or to neglect the responsibilities of the relationship, then there may be more than one set of eyes staring back at you when you look in the mirror.
Besides yours, there is always the unseen eyes of God. God Speed to you.
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