The truth about dating leagues

Have you ever dated someone you thought was way out of your league? Did you ever stop to consider why you think you don't belong in someone else's league and what league you're subconsciously putting yourself in as a result?

Create Your Own Dating League

In this article, you'll be introduced to a new frame of thinking when it comes to the whole dating league concept. Movies like "She's Out of My League" tend to perpetuate this false notion that dating leagues are determined by your level of physical attraction. But there are so many different factors beneath the surface that contribute to someone's overall attraction level, which ultimately determines your status in one dating league over another. For some people, these underlying factors can make you more or less attractive than originally perceived thereby putting you in either an upper or lower division dating league.

So instead of thinking someone is out of your league because he or she is too good for you, or too this or too that, stop to ask yourself whether that person is good enough for you. If you were a member of your own dating league, what qualities must a prospective player possess in order to compete for your heart? Do you want to date in a league you created for yourself where you call the shots, or do you want to date in someone else's league where you have to play along or sit on the bench?

Why Someone is Really Out of Your Dating League

If you are tired of sitting on the proverbial sidelines, maybe it's time for you to take a timeout and re-assess what kind of guys are truly out of your league. Here are a few example reasons of why you should probably cut a guy from your league, or at least sit him on the bench until he steps up his game:

  1. He is emotionally unavailable.
  2. He makes empty promises.
  3. He straight up ignores your phone calls or text messages.
  4. He always has an excuse for why he didn't call or return your text.
  5. He only contacts you when he wants something.
  6. He lacks in ambition.
  7. He is more attractive when he doesn't speak.
  8. His maturity level is beneath you.

Whose League Are You Really Dating In?

There are many reasons why someone is out of your league, all of which serve as somewhat of reflection of your own self-worth. If you aren't getting your needs met in a relationship, and you are totally okay with that, then you're essentially telling yourself that you don't deserve better than you already have. That's a mediocre way of thinking reserved for people who want mediocre relationships. But you're not a mediocre person. You want more for yourself. If you want to start dating in the league above you, then you need to start stepping up your game to become a better person and date higher quality people.

Everyone has their own unique dating league. The right players for your personalized dating league are going to be the ones who match your desires, treat you the way you want to be treated and put in the time to win you over because in the game of love (or lust if you will), YOU are the prize so start treating yourself like one. Consider the thought that we are who we date. If you don't like your dating pool, stop swimming it. Find another pond to fish in. Be inspired to step up your game so you can attract more of what you want into your life.

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, LA Dating Examiner

Niki Payne is a talented writer with an eclectic array of experience writing for newspapers, magazines and the Web. She currently works as a professional blogger and social media specialist for global brands, small businesses and entrepreneurs. She's a born and raised SoCal woman with wisdom...

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