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The nature of addiction

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What is addiction really? Who becomes an addict? Why do some people become addicted to something and many do not? Is there such a thing as a 'real alcoholic' or a 'real addict'? What is the nature of addiction? What is the nature of the addict?

These questions have been tackled in many fields and ways with some insight and scientific proof offered but mostly there is a mystery to these questions. We addicts who know we are one, have proven it beyond a shadow of a doubt, know the depth of the questions, but can't answer them sufficiently.

So what is the nature of the addict? An addict needs something that can't seem to be gotten. We are seekers of seeking. We are chronic malcontents. We are itchy. We are movement itself. We can be restless, irritable, discontent and need a fix. We are addicted to comfort and contentment. We will almost die to get into a 'zone' and stay there. We can be high drama itself. We are actors, liars, thieves, cheaters, losers, winners, successful, unsuccessful, and the list goes on. We are sensitive people referred to in the Big Book of AA as 'bodily and mentally different than our fellows'. In other words we are on the outer like everyone else but inside we seem to need a deep spiritual connection and experience and until we get there we will seek until we find.

Some in the seeking of a fix, a find die. They run out of time, get too close to the edge, experiment too long, are too stubborn, prideful, angry, resentful, fearful, and dishonest and they run out of time. They give up a minute before the miracle. And we need miracles and we get them. And many marching off with their miracle fix, their spiritual experience, their spiritual awakening through program or other means live and live well.

One day there may be a scientific term or explanation to the question why some become addicts and some do not and there may be a pill so addicts can do stuff without dying from it. There will never be a pill for the soul of the addict. Only love, tolerance, peace and a dose of some 'God' of understanding can save the soul of the pensive thinking seeker of the deep.

If you are an addict hang in there, seek until you find, utilize any and all means to stay clean/sober and sane, work a program if you are in one, call out to those who love you, go inward daily to connect to the Mystery and odds are you will not die from addiction.

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