There are 6,912 identified languages used across the globe and of those the most popular ones are Spanish, Hindi, Portuguese, Russian, Japanese, Arabic, Chinese, English, German, and Bengali. With nearly 7,000 unique languages it is a miracle that different countries, cultures, and people are able to effectively communicate with each other. However, these language barriers were broken through because people took the time to learn and practice different languages.
Love is not so different. Romance has its own language as well and speaks in unique tongues. Many would agree that love is the most important word in the English language-and the most confusing. Why is it so puzzling? Because there are hundreds of ways a person can say "I love you" by their actions alone.
When people hear the word "love" they should think of the term as a verb, a big important verb. Love is an action and this is not initially referring to sexual intercourse (although this is one of the love languages) but other kinds of love. However, before discovering the 5 basic love languages, it is vital to understand their importance and purpose in a romantic relationship or any relationship for that matter.
Similar to how you and others speak a certain language, you also speak a love language in your relationships. And because we are all so uniquely designed and grew up in different atmospheres, we all developed our own love language. Because of this, people tend to find themselves a partner (boyfriend, girlfriend, or spouse) that speaks a different love language than theirs. And this is where relationships continually find themselves in an unsolvable rut. Here is a great example:
Different Love Languages-“Where relationships get stuck”.
Jake and Allison have been dating for 6 months and are going on a romantic date to celebrate. After dinner, Jake insisted on paying for the meal but received no gratitude from Allison. He left the restaurant feeling unappreciated and slightly irritated. Then they went for a stroll on the beach where Allison was hoping for Jake to hold her hand so she playfully nudged him but Jake kept his distance. She left the beach feeling like she had done something to repel Jake and was disappointed at the end of the date. When Jake and Allison returned to their homes that night they couldn’t help but feel unloved.
Many couples, like Jake and Allison, run into the same problem. They have a great time together but because they don’t speak each other’s love language their “love tank becomes empty”. Did you catch the problem in the story? Jake was showing his affection for Allison by paying the dinner bill and was hoping that she would show gratitude by saying something like “Thank you so much for paying. You’re a real gentleman”. If Allison had said something similar to Jake then he would have felt loved and appreciated (“full love tank”). But Allison did not speak that love language to Jake but spoke her own language when they went to the beach. Allison playfully touched Jake when walking on the beach because physical touch was her love language and when Jake did not hold her hand or hung her, she felt unloved as well. However, if Jake had tried to tickle her or give her a kiss on the cheek then Allison would have felt admired and loved (“full love tank”).
Discovering and understanding love languages is critical to all relationships, especially romantic relationships because it can do more than solve problems but it can also elevate your relationship and love to a whole new level.
Check in next week to discover the 5 love languages and how you can use them to communicate “I love you” in a way that your spouse, boyfriend, or girlfriend will appreciate.
Comments