There are many proverbial quotes that are true to form and indisputable. For example, one of them is: "If it looks like a duck; swims like a duck; and quacks like a duck; then it probably is a duck."
We should simply trust our judgment, our instincts, when something appears to be what we think. Second guessing ourselves to shield the obvious is risky and dangerous. It usually is what we see. Our eyes tell the story. Why shield the truth?
Who are we fooling?
Time and time again, we solicit opinions on issues that need no opinion. This statement may be a tongue twister, but it is true.
We ask others what they think about conduct that is transparently clear. Why do we ask the question? We ask because we want the answer to be not what it truthfully is.
Let me show you what I mean.
Your so called boyfriend has been missing in action for 4 days. He hasn't answered his home or mobile phone. You have heard his voicemail recording so many times that you can recite the text; countless messages have been left. No emails or text messages have been acknowledged. You did not call his job, because you don't want to cause a problem for him. How honorable! His car is not at home, because you stalked it out on day 2. He's not in the hospital; he's not ill. So where is his incognito self?
Is this a no brainier?
Take a guess.
Why would we ask someone "a where is he" question when we know the answer? It is painfully obvious what the answer is. Most likely, he is enjoying the company of someone else. Without a doubt, he is dodging you. When we ask dumb questions, it is us, not them, who look like an idiot. Wouldn't it be more comforting and refreshing to make him look idiotic, rather than you?
Remember, the duck test. If your guy looks, swims, and quacks (i.e. talks) like a duck; he is a guy duck. Why would you think or convince yourself otherwise? Dr. Maya Angelou says, "When people show you who they are, believe them.” I simply say, "Quack, quack!"