Have there ever been a caregiver which is the one everyone turns to when a caregiver is needed? Do we feel there is a flashing neon sign on our head which says “Caregiver inquire within”? Well we are not alone, as this seems to happen much of the time. However, at what cost to this person? We are not talking monetary cost (although that may be part of it), we are talking emotional cost.
Sometimes in a family there is one person who just seems to be the one, the consummate caregiver. However, this person does pay a very high price for years of being that person. Anyone can be a caregiver for a while or even for one person and then work though the emotional impact. However, there are people, families turn to each time a caregiver is needed whether it is for childcare or eldercare; and those people almost have a perfected career of it. For them there is frequently not a question of ‘would you help out’ with this situation, instead there is a presumptive when are going to step into this person’s life.
We need to know when and how to say “No”. There is absolutely nothing wrong with saying “No”. After all, we would not be ask if someone else had said “Yes”, or taken the lead and stepped into the role. It is ok to think about our own life and our desires for the future. The person needing the care would want that above all. And once we say “No”, we will actually feel better, after all like any other part of our life sometimes we do not realize what a burden it has become.