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The Best 4th of July Story Ever

The banner yet waves..
The banner yet waves..
Photo by Mario Tama/Getty Images

The other day, in honor of the true meaning of the 4th, I rode a bike up the path from Philadelphia to Valley Forge National Park. It was raining most of the trip and the wind, though warm, was stiff.

After churning about 20 miles I finally arrived exhausted. My legs were like jelly and my back and legs covered in mud.
But that was all now irrelevant as I stood before a wall and read the names of the Patriots who had given their lives on this very spot.

They seemed to reach through time and I hoped the citizenry today would begin to gain more of an appreciation for their sacrifice as well as all those who defend the Constitution.

The giant wall at Valley Forge offered one particularly stirring quote from General Washington himself.
"To see men without clothes to cover their nakedness, without blankets to lie upon, without shoes…without a hut to cover them, yet submitting without a murmur, is proof of a patience and obedience which in my opinion is without parallel."

I was entirely moved by this but all I could think to do was go to the gift shop and buy a revolutionary hat.

When I finally arrived back to Fairmount Park in the late afternoon, I passed a large group of people gathered for dinner at the Valley Green Inn. I was covered in mud and dressed in my customary revolutionary flourish so I simply offered them this, "Ladies and gentlemen, my hat it has three corners!"

They just looked at me in consternation but were too interested in having dinner to try and figure it all out.

Yes it was a bit odd I admit but millions of brave men and women have fought for our right to be weird. In the timeless words of Night Ranger remember that "You can still rock in America!"

I wish you all a Happy 4th of July in this greatest country on God's green earth.

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