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Test driving a re-marriage

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Dreams of driving a car are often dreams about how we move along the roads of life. How the car handles the curves may speak to how the driver manages the challenges of daily life. Today’s dreamer has a test drive of a car she used to own as she considers going back to a life she used to live.

Dear Carolyn,

My husband “Ray” and I split up about a year and a half ago. It was about as amiable as a divorce can be, especially since I broke his heart. Maybe it was amiable because I broke his heart! I think he wanted to keep everything friendly and easy so it wouldn’t spoil the chances of our getting back together. He told me he has always held out hope of that.

We have been talking lately and going for coffee, things like that, all very public, nothing serious or intimate in any way. I can tell he still wants us to remarry. I’m not sure how I feel about it.

Now here’s my dream: I bought a new car, but it was my old car, the one I drove when Ray and I were married. It was waiting for me in a parking lot. When I got in it, it was cramped and seemed a lot smaller than I remembered it. But I adjusted the seat and was comfortable enough.

I drove it fast over dirt roads and muddy roads. I skimmed over ruts and potholes, slippery spots and puddles. The car became a go-cart and I was grumpy about it because there wasn’t much to it. I was annoyed that I might be splashed by one of the puddles, but the water splashed away from me. In the end, I was surprised and pleased that the little car made it through everything, handled so well, and was comfortable overall.


Car Shopping

Dear Car Shopping,

As you describe him, it seems that Ray has been in a holding pattern since your split, hoping to get back with you. You might say he was in a parking lot, like the car in your dream. It is the car you drove when you were together. And now, as you are giving Ray a second look, your dream represents this as taking that car, Ray, for a test drive!

The car is different from the way you remember it, just as a second marriage might be different. For one thing, it seems cramped at first. But when you make an adjustment, you are comfortable. Maybe the first time around you were unnecessarily grumpy because you expected more than you truly needed. Perhaps you were the pessimist, expecting to be splashed before you saw which way the water would fly.

Keep in mind Dear Dreamer – you would need to adjust yourself to make things work with Ray. If you do that, you could travel many a road nimbly and in pleasant and surprising contentment.

Sweet Dreams to You!

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