Isobel and Arwyn waking up to their twins sisters at home for the first time.
It is never easy watching a new baby hooked up to many different devices, but try and image what an older sibling is dealing with. A new baby that they have anticipated for months cannot be seen or touched. Now mom and dad are wrapped up in dealing with the added issues that come with a premature baby or a baby that just requires an extended stay in the NICU.
Sometimes a big sister or big brother can be trying to handle this very difficult situation on their own, not fully understanding what is going on. Some children even feel jealous, scared, or anxious. It is important to give older siblings adequate attention when dealing with a baby (or babies) in NICU.
Here are a few ways to help an older sibling deal with the added stress of their new baby being in NICU.
The most important thing is for a sibling is to be reassured that this is temporary and that though many days may pass without being able to see their new baby; they will get to see them. Ways to help is with photographs and video footage. Not only can this bring the baby straight to them, but it can reassure any child with the simple sight of a little face that belongs to them. Do not worry too much about all the tubes and wires that are attached to the baby. Most children look right past that stuff. There may be questions and they should be addressed with intelligence but with care. Though children are much stronger than most believe, they sense fear.
Another great thing that some NICUs have are windows in which the new baby can be brought to and onlookers can take a peak. Not all NICUs have this, but the ones that do can really give older siblings a peace on mind about where their baby is.
Parents can have older siblings make their new baby a card to display by their NICU or send a small toy (that of course they cannot play with).
No matter what is done to help pass the time till all siblings are united, one day they will be running around the house together and the first few days or months of their life all but forgotten. Children are impervious and loving creatures that though the time in NICU is difficult; things will be fine. Time moves so fast.
Check out this great book for siblings to help simplify the complications of NICU:
Platypus Media book: Come Home Soon, Baby Brother!
Other articles in this series:
Surviving NICU part 1: An introduction
Surviving NICU part 2: Feeding your baby
Surviving NICU part 3: Stages of beds in NICU
Surviving NICU part 4: What is Bradycardia or Apnea?
Surviving NICU part 5: My baby needs O2
Surviving NICU part 6: Monitors
Surviving NICU part 7: Aiva's stay in NICU
Surviving NICU part 8: Caroline and Sophie
Surviving NICU part 9: Jaundice
Surviving NICU part 10: Helping older siblings
Surviving NICU part 11: Blood work and IV therapy
Surviving NICU part 12: Yes, you can say enough is enough!
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NICU support for Evansville area parent
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