Once again, the clash of the NFL titans’ is coming to a head on Sunday, February 3rd and after long searches through cookbooks, hours of surfing on the internet and the endless kitchen experimentation the following ‘Top Ten of Odd’ has been compiled for your buffet this year:
#10 Pigskins – Open up a tube of crescent rolls and separate. Drop a tablespoon of previously cooked barbecue pulled pork into the center of each triangle allowing some to spill out for looks. Top the pork with some of your favorite shredded cheese (pepper-jack works great). Roll these little bad boys up and bake according to package directions. When the come out piping hot, serve with bread and butter pickle chips and a bowl of barbecue sauce. Touchdown!
#9 Cowboy Sushi –Marinate a nice sized skirt steak in olive oil, vinegar, garlic, cilantro, salt and pepper overnight if possible. Grill over a hot flame for 3-4 minutes on each side (Medium). Remove and allow to rest. Meanwhile, prepare a box of Spanish rice. Now, lay a tortilla flat on your work area and spread enough prepared Spanish rice to thinly cover ½ the tortilla. Once the steak has rested, slice thinly and then lay 4-5 strips on top of the rice layer evenly. Add one green onion some blue cheese crumbles and then roll it up. Start with the filling side and roll tightly till it looks like a ‘log’. Place these rolls on a cookie sheet and bake at 250ºF for 15-20 minute to warm through and give the tortilla a little color. Place on a cutting board and slice across the ‘log’ into sushi pieces (6 per Tortilla). Serve with some steak sauce or salsas of your choice.
#8 Spiked Footballs (Meatballs) – Combine 2 lbs ground beef, ¾ cup long grain white rice, ½ cup water, a little diced onion, some garlic powder, some chili flakes, salt and pepper in a large mixing bowl. In a another bowl, combine a large can of tomato sauce (15 oz), 1 cup water and 3 tablespoons Worchertshire sauce. Pour this mixture into a baking dish. Form the meat into golf ball sized ‘footballs’ and place into the sauce in the baking dish. Use some additional grains of rice to make the laces for the footballs as well. Cover with foil and bake at 350ºF for 45 minutes. Uncover and bake for an additional 15 minutes more. Warm, meaty and sized to eat! Pass me another, get it, ‘pass’….um, okay, moving on.
#7 Fumbled PBJ Wings – Marinate some thawed and naked whole wings in a combination of creamy peanut butter, grape jelly and some grape juice (to thin out a bit) for a few hours. Remove from bag and discard used marinade. Bake at 375º on a wire rack which is on a tin foil lined cookie sheet for 30 minutes. Remove from oven, baste with a separately made bowl of the PBJ mixture, flip and baste again. Return to oven for an additional 30 minutes. Glazed and delicious!
#6 Shrimp Blitzed Jalapeño Poppers – Wear some latex gloves, slice a dozen or so jalapeños in ½ and clean out the pith and seeds. In a sauté pan, add some butter and 10-12 cleaned shrimp. Cook till pink and remove from heat to cool. Mince and add to a large bowl along with a block of room temperature cream cheese, a handful of your favorite shredded cheese (cheddar, queso, pepper-jack, blue crumbles, etc…), some minced garlic, and some diced green onions. Wrap each with a ½ strip of peppered bacon and bake on a cookie sheet at 350ºF till bacon is cooked (40-50 minutes). Serve with some sour cream, ranch dressing or more cheese, as in queso dip.
#5 Man-to-Man Sliders – Slice one large onion and cook in a ¼ stick of butter in a large black skillet till translucent. Combine 1 lb ground beef, 1 lb ground pork, salt, pepper, some chili pepper flakes, and dash of steak sauce. Portion out golf ball size meatballs and press onto the onions in skillet to make sliders. Allow onions and patties to cook for 5-10 minutes, then flip. Cook 5 minutes more. Top with a jarred jalapeño slice and your favorite cheese. Cover skillet to let cheese melt. Slice a Hawaiian Sweet Roll in half, remove burgers with accompanying onions from pan, and place onto the buns. Top with other half of the bun and cover plate with tin foil to let everything steam. Serve with all the sides and watch the game!
#4 Gridiron Dirt Dessert – One tube of chocolate cookie dough, some Oreo’s and one box of brownie mix. Layer the bottom of a casserole dish with tin foil and spray with Pam. Press the whole tube of cookie dough onto the foil and be sure it covers the bottom in one thick layer. Organize Oreos on top to cover completely. Combine brownie mixture in another bowl according to box directions and pour over Oreo layer. Smooth out and top with walnuts, chocolate chips or green/brown M&M’s. Place into a preheated 350ºF oven for 30-35 minutes or till a knife comes out clean. Allow to cool, flip over to remove as one big piece and remove foil. Flip back over onto a cutting board and slice. Serving options include topping with hot fudge and/or whip cream.
#3 Buttonhook Catfish Nuggets – Clean and pat dry 4 large catfish fillets. Cut into 1 inch chunks and toss with a season mixture of salt, pepper and cayenne. Let set for an hour in the fridge to enhance flavoring. Prepare dredge station with a bowl of milk, a bowl of flour & corn meal and a wax paper covered cookie sheet. Drop each chunk into milk, then into flour/corn meal to coat and drop onto the cookie sheet. After all have been coated, deep fry till golden brown. Drain on a rack so not to get soggy and serve with tartar sauce juiced up with steroids (hot sauce) and a bowl of barbecue sauce.
#2 Going Deep –Make yourself a beer batter using Drakes. Open a bag of bite sized snickers, or slice some zucchini into sticks, or cube up a few clean and patted dry chicken breasts, or even drain some Famous Dave’s Spicy Pickles. Be sure everything is dry so the batter will stick. Fry at 350ºF and have a cookie rack handy to allow these tasty bites time to drain (putting on paper towels will only make everything soggy). Post-it notes help ID each plateful and be sure to serve up with taste appropriate sauces.
#1 Buffalo Wing Corn-Muffins –Use enough Jiffy corn meal muffin mix to make a total of two dozen. Mix with 4 chopped jalapeños, ½ cup shredded cheddar cheese, ¼ cup drained whole kernel corn, ¼ cup bacon crumbles and a dash or two of hot sauce. Bake according to the package directions in muffin cups. While these are baking, deep fry 24 smaller naked chicken drummies till golden brown and set aside to drain. Open a tub of cream cheese cupcake frosting and mix with ¼ cup of blue cheese crumbles. Scoop into a Ziploc bag with the corner tip snipped off for piping. For assembly, allow corn-muffins to cool and pipe on the frosting in a swirl. Top each frosted corn-muffin with a strategically balanced chicken wing. Drizzle each with Franks Hot Sauce and be sure to have plenty of cold beer and napkins available. This screams FOOTBALL!
This is one down and dirty Superbowl buffet. The only thing left is to sit back, watch your money squares, drink some beer and check the mirror from time to time for crap stuck in your teeth. It’s the last football till August, so enjoy and fill up on these Top Ten of Odd buffet dishes.
Smoke ‘em if you got ‘em and don’t forget your bib!
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