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Strip clubs, boyfriends, and jealousy - testing the boundaries


Image: The Hangover

As hard as this may be to believe considering I'm normally dripping with a plethora of wit, charm and creativity, there are times when I have no idea what to write... so I ask my friends. My friends are geniuses, and they come up with gems like "well, the other day I was at a strip club, and I've always wondered what girlfriends think when their boyfriends go to strip clubs."

GOLDEN! I'll write about that. Oh wait, I know nothing about it. I don't know if it's right or wrong or immoral or if all men with wives will immediately burst into flames as soon as they get behind the velvet ropes. However, I do have opinions.

"Ladies - what are your thoughts on boyfriends going to strip clubs?"

"Absolutely not."

"As a person who enjoys the strip club, I don't really care."

"Definitely not. No no no. Not that I have a boyfriend to speak of, but if I did it would be a big fat NO."

"I don't really think it's a big deal, personally. Strippers aren't really a threat. They only like you if you pay."

"I feel good about it..."

"I'm okay with it as long as he's okay with me going with if I ask to tag along. Otherwise he's hogging all the fun."

"I don't think its a big deal. As long as it's not like every weekend or all the time, cause that's creepy."

Bottom line - talk to your girl about it. If that fails, rest easy knowing we WILL talk to you about it if we have a problem. (Got that ladies? TALK TO HIM ABOUT IT IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM).

If you're wondering my opinion (of course you are) I don't see an issue. There was a day when I would have sat at home and cried about it, hoping overnight I'd gain some D-Cups, an orange spray tan, clip-in extensions and temporary loss of dignity all so my boyfriend would love me the way he loves them (cue emo tears). However, since then, I've been to the strip club with guys (none of which were my boyfriend). All they want to do is go and laugh and have a good time together and see some boobies while they're at it. (GUYS - correct me if I'm wrong here) That's really it. If a guy is expecting to go to a strip club, leave with one of the ladies and snack it up, he's a) gross b) undesirable c) desperate or d) grossly undesirable and desperate. I don't think guys have a real interest in strippers aside from the fantasies, and many wouldn't want it to go past that. (Once again GUYS - correct me if I'm wrong here) Those chicks are expensive, but you know what else they are? They're also a dime a dozen. You're not, and you've already got him.

That being said, relax. Let him go see some boobs if that's what he really wants. If he's wanting a weekly professional lap dance from Trinity, be concerned. But if he's spending a weekend in Vegas with the guys and they have plans to make a pit stop or two, don't fret. If you trust him, there should be no issue. If religious or moral values are the problem... that's between the two of you. I won't go there.

And boys - listen to her and respect her opinion. Hear her out, hear her reasons, and don't throw out Jerkface McStupidpants remarks like "it's not up to you." Because then you might get slapped. Oh, and remember when you see those girls on stage... that's somebody's daughter up there.

 Ladies - more opinions are welcome. Guys - how would you feel if your significant other was completely uncomfortable and unsupportive of you going to a strip club?


  • Just A Girl 5 years ago

    Ohh yeah Miss "I don't know how I'm going to write this article."

    And then it's awesome. And right on. Strip clubs are fun. They're a little skeevy sometimes but it's not a big deal. And I've never met a guy who wanted to go constantly, at least not a normal guy.

  • Jeney 5 years ago

    I completely agree with you... I've got nothing else to add to it. Fantastic article!

  • 5 years ago

    Haha, hilarious op-ed, as usual.

    Actually I would suggest a girl trying a strip club WITH her guy. I've done it, and believe me, if you knew me, you'd NEVER expect that. But you know what? It was fine. We set up the ground rules ahead of time (1. Looking, but no touching. 2. The second I'm uncomfortable, we leave.) and it was fine. I'd even do it again. I'm not saying we'll make a habit of it, but on trips to certain places (like New Orleans or Vegas) why not take advantage of the local attractions? :P

  • Anon 5 years ago

    Nice article... You asked a guy to correct you if you are wrong.

    I don't think you are wrong, but not all people are there just to laugh with their buddies. I've seen people there before who are clearly looking for something else. The one time I went I saw a dude who was throwing out ones like an ATM, he disappeared after that.

    Most of the time it is just fun... but there will be certain guys, and certain clubs that are all about the happy ending. What happens behind the door once you've paid for your lap dance is up to the girl.

  • Pecosa 5 years ago

    I used to be the "No way, no how, that's just NOT right. You have me, what do you want to see another girl's boobs for?" type. Yeah, I was a wee bit psycho.

    And then I went to a strip club. And it was FUN. And the guys? Yeah, mostly in it for the drinks and hanging with their boys. And honestly, there's just as much a chance if not more of a guy cheating at the local dive bar than at the strip club.

  • Kim - Royal Oak Nightlife` 5 years ago

    I think you're hilarious FYI.

    And I agree plus one: if you can't trust your guy at a strip club, you have way bigger issues that where he slides his singles (so long as your beau isn't the weekly creepy regular type or the sex in the champagne room type.)

  • Patrick Rall-Detroit Autos Examiner 5 years ago

    Great article.
    Before I met my wife, me and a couple of my buddies spent pretty much every weekend night(and some weekdays)in the strip clubs. We were "looking for anything" other than to drink a ton of beer and look at naked girls. I met my wife and as soon as we started dating she would go to the clubs with me and she still does. We travel for automotive media events and Ive been to clubs all over the country and in the past five years she has been to all of them with me.

    She even came on my bachelor party in Windsor and had as much fun as the rest of us!

  • Patrick Rall-Detroit Autos Examiner 5 years ago

    Oh...for the record, not every guy who spends a ton of time in a strip club "wants something". I mean, of course we all want something but thats not always why we are there. We didnt go to try to pick up the strippers...we just wanted to go out and didnt feel like going to any of the dating meat market clubs. Strip clubs have sports, booze, and girls that you dont have to buy a drink to see naked. Strip clubs are just as expensive as most sports bars and strip clubs have the advantage of the naked girls...although the food is usually pretty questionable.

    However, in my years of spending time in strip clubs, Ive seen plenty of very creepy guys who give normal guys a bad reputation.

  • Victor--Seattle Singles Scene 5 years ago

    I concur with Kim. If a girl is tripping because her boyfriend hits a strip club with the boys once in a while she's got trust issues and body issues that have nothing to do with the temptations of a strip club ;-)

  • Anonymous 3 years ago

    I found out the hard way that strip clubs aren't innocent fun. Bogarts, Henry VIII, Flight Club, and many, if not all, of them are just covers for brothels. I didn't mind my husband going occasionally until I got herpes, found out what's been happening with all the "innocent fun" and it's ruined my life. My husband lost me got gained some std's & a few stalking strippers who are desperate to hang onot the bucks. Close them all, or at least ban touching-there's no going back from there.

  • Anonymous 2 years ago

    I am completely uncomfortable with the idea. Yeah, it stems from lower-self-esteem, but also on a level of respect. I am someone who has been cheated on multiple times, but never cheat and for me there is now a no-tolerance rule. However, the guy I am with knew this when he got into the relationship with me. He understands that I do not approve of him going out of his way to get his "fantasy" by seeing a naked woman dance around. I proposed that the money he would spend going out to the strip club could easily go to getting fun, kinky, arousing and overall fantasy-inducing satisfying toys. There is more than one way for a man to get his need for fantastical sexual encounters without making his woman feel any sort of inadequacy. Then again, if you are all for strip-clubs, good for you. Either way I think the bottom line is a full disclosure agreement on it BEFORE it becomes a problem.

    Plus, most guys would flip their cookies if their girl went out to male revue shows.