A very scary statistic was published just over a year ago stating that parents have meaningful conversation with their children a total of 20 minutes per week. Twenty minutes per week! What the heck is going on?
Many people relate this issue to stress. Both parents tend to work now. There are always outside activities in which the children are involved – and are pretty much required to be involved if they ever want to look at a scholarship for any type of large university. There is the housework to accomplish, bills to pay, food to prepare – or purchase as many households don’t fix food any more – and then there may be pets to attend to. All of this adds up to stress being introduced into a parent’s life, but is that any type of excuse? It is not as if all of these things were not known, discussed and agreed upon.
When a person decides to become a parent, they should certainly understand the level of commitment required in order to be a successful parent. Too many individuals have planned out their ‘roadmap to success’ and are willing to compromise the most important aspects on the map in order to get themselves to where they desire to be in their lives. There is nothing wrong with goals, but forsaking your family is yet another matter!
Children require love and attention. Just take a look at the Russian baby tests if you doubt this statement. The babies that were fed but left on their own in their cribs to survive – those without being held, talked to, or loved – perished. The babies that were doted on survived.
Today, many parents wonder why their children are getting into trouble; why they are cutting themselves, taking drugs or drinking to excess. Perhaps the number one reason is that they do not have a good relationship with their parents.
Kids need the adults in their lives to show them the way, to correct them when they are wrong, to give them guidelines, and most of all, to love them unconditionally. You can’t just like your kid, you need to love them!
When stressors get in your way, find a method to overcome them. Perhaps the stressors don’t have to be present in your life at all, maybe you invite them by wanting to be recognized thus taking on too much and ignoring the most important factor, your family.
When stress tends to become the dominating factor in your life, it is time to reevaluate. Too much stress and too little attention can certainly ruin any chance for a solid relationship with your children. Think about it and then decide, ‘is this what you want?’