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Spicy Subscriptions turns up the heat!

This lovely Spice Box arrives in a discreet white package to your door.
This lovely Spice Box arrives in a discreet white package to your door.
M. Gwynn

Last week was National Clitoris Week. Some brave men asked why the clitoris got a whole week for celebration when major historical figures only get a day. The answer was pretty simple. We all know who Washington, MLK, and Lincoln are and where they can be found, but most men, by and large, have trouble locating the clitoris so a week is needed just for them to find it so it can be celebrated in the manner in which it deserves. Enter Spicy Subscriptions, an entrepreneurial online subscription order service that provides everything women and men need to lavish loving attention on the clitoris (and all other lady parts) packed into adorable gift boxes delivered, discreetly, to one’s front door.

To be clear, it should be pointed out that every day should be National Clitoris Day, and it can be if you sign up to get your own sexy Spicy Subscription each month. And for the men who are wondering “What’s in it for me?” Let me just say, a happy wife makes a happy life, a joyful girlfriend is a true giver (yes, that makes you, the boyfriend, the joyful recipient), and a satisfied clitoris might mean a little less work for you on those days when you’re too tired to go find Waldo.

Purchasing one of their subscription levels for your lady could make your life that much better! The new Deluxe Spice Box arrived in a sweet gift box that was filled with lovely goodies. It’s Sex-Swag at its finest; just like getting a Swag Bag from the Oscars, but oh so much more awesome because you keep getting a new one each month and I’m pretty sure Oscar swag hasn’t resulted in multiple orgasms.

The ‘Dress Down’ box comes equipped to provide glamour to one’s sex life. Talk about setting the mood! Begin with applying some Lusty Nail Lacquer advertised as a Sex-Rated nail polish. It’s a new product and we ladies love new cosmetics. Once nails are dry, light up the Simply Sensual Massage Candle. Made with natural soy, this green tea aloe candle is also imbued with natural pheromones so the longer it burns, the more in the mood you’ll be. By candlelight, have your guy give you a rub down with Wicked Candy Apple massage oil. Now the fun begins!

Whip out the Rabbit! Yes, the Rabbit, that vibrating gizmo that may have women asking “who needs a man?” Technically, the Rabbit has all kinds of features like a spinning tip, vibrating rabbit ears, two motors for extra power, massage beads on the shaft, 6 rotation speeds, 7 vibe functions, and is also waterproof for shower fun. But who cares about tech at a moment like this? All you really need to know is that it will keep you coming back for more…over and over again.

This is good news for guys who want to wow their women. Nothing wrong with utilizing an “assist” fellas. As long as it gets the job done and she’s happy, there’s no shame in the game. And if she’s really happy (and not too exhausted), she might just make use of the last item in her Spice Box; the strawberry flavored Kama Sutra Lip Fetish – a sweet lip gloss to enhance oral seduction. Was that too subtle? I was talking blowies for “oh-ies”, tit for tat. You know the drill.

So now that Spicy Subscriptions has upped their game and created an even more awesome package for the ladies (because it’s all about the package, guys!), you may want to consider adding this to your romantic repertoire. You can do this for as little as $19.95 a month. Seriously, it’s a pretty inexpensive way to spice up the old love life. And gals, you certainly don’t need a man to have quality alone time. In between boyfriends (or girlfriends)? A Spicy Subscription will make you forget all about that. Hubby too tired? No problem. Boyfriend in the dog house? No reason why you should miss out on your nightly “oh, oh, oh!” You can even make him watch!

The new, improved Spicy Subscriptions gets two orgasmically spasming toes up!