Dear Housewives,
I have been wanting to write you but felt uneasy and kept putting it off. I figure, no one will know who I am so here it goes. I have a problem that no one knows. Not even my family. I think I have a social anxiety disorder of some kind. I like people, I enjoy being around them but I get nervous in social settings. If I am meeting a friend for lunch or going to a family birthday party, I am ok. It is when I am around strangers I feel like everyone is watching me. I feel awkward. Any tips?
Oh, I think you both are great. You have good answers to some tough questions.
Signed,
Not saying who I am in Connecticut
FLORA: Hey, I think I know who you are...just kidding. Dear friend in CT, since you are alright around those you know, it does not appear to be a disorder. Maybe you need some guidance on the art of small talk. If you have an upcoming event, read the paper or go on-line to be up on current events. Is there something you are passionate about? If so, share it if a conversation is struck up. And always ask questions about 'the other person', ask about their interests or ideas. And deep breathing may work well in this type of situation.
JUNE: First, may I thank you for your impeccable taste in advice givers; we aim to please. Your problem is a totally common one. The commercials on TV would have you thinking you need to get on some medication that may or may not make you pass out, pass wind, have blurred vision and so on.
I disagree with Flora, being around strangers is the problem, anyone can be around people they know. Anxiety disorder usually is around strangers. Is the anxiety disabling? For example, are there physical symptoms like dizziness, difficulty breathing or a panicky feeling? If so, you should see your doctor. Those are signs of an anxiety attack and you may need medication. You could see a therapist to find out what makes you anxious. If you are just a bit nervous before parties then don't worry since almost everyone feels a bit nervous of the unknown with strangers. Go mingle, have a drink and enjoy.
Dear Housewives,
"I wish that I can have my own house with my brother so we can get our own dog. I am five years old. I have no idea why we can't have one. I wish that I can have a pet with my brother and me. I wish that my parents would let us get a puppy this month or what ever day you want. Just let us get a puppy. We will have a lot of funny playing together with my puppy. I will name him Max."
Written by a friend for a friend.
FLORA: Dear five year old dog lover, I hope that you are able to read this response to your request. Dear Housewives cannot give you a puppy but perhaps we can influence your parents to start talking with you and your brother about pets and all that goes with having one. There may be a good reason why your parents do not want one. I hope you have a nice talk soon.
JUNE: Maybe if Flora comes to walk him, mommy and daddy will say yes. I bet if you show them how grown up you both are, after time they may give in. In the mean time, write to Santa Claus, tooth fairy and the fairy godmother with your request--we are not that powerful. Good luck.
Hi Flora, I am currently reading "Resilience" by Elizabeth Edwards. It is a tragic summary of her life and the direction it has taken. She discusses the death of her son, Wade as well as her marriage and the problems with it. It was a quick read and she seems very likeable. I felt it was quite sad but she doesn't write it as she wants to be felt sorry for. Also, Funny People is an Adam Sandler movie that just released to DVD. It was a little slow at times and lacking in laughs but watchable. The story was one that has been done many times of the overindulgent bachelor who find his worth once faced with illness. Some funny parts and an okay watch. I would say rent it.
Hi June, You will be proud of me! I am learning to knit. So the only book (besides my trusty Bible) I have been reading is "Learn How to Knit". So when people say knit, purl, I can now say with confidence, "oh sure, I can purl, I can knit, not a problem".
I am reading the entire Bible this year and so far, so good. I read /Our Daily Bread/ (free little booklet or on-line at www.rbc.org <http://www.rbc.org> click on Our Daily Bread they give you what to read so it is manageable.
JUNE: Geez, Flora you have your very own little bible belt over there. You really need to get out. Oof, I hope I don't get struck by lightening.
Dear Readers,
Do you have a question regarding family life, budgeting, customer service issues, DVD or book reviews, or home organization? We will give you our candid advise from a family perspective. Contact us via email at dearhousewives@live.com with your confidential question and we will answer it in the next column.
HAPPY HOLIDAYS TO OUR READERS AND THEIR FAMILIES!
June and Flora
Comments