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Sister of victim Ron Goldman admits wanting to kill O.J. Simpson in new book

Kim Goldman, sister of murder victim Ron Goldman, admits to wanting to kill O.J. Simpson in new book
Kim Goldman, sister of murder victim Ron Goldman, admits to wanting to kill O.J. Simpson in new bookEthan Miller/Getty Images

According to Today News on May 9, Kim Goldman, sister of the man murdered with O.J. Simpson’s ex-wife Nicole Brown Simpson, wanted to kill O.J. Simpson. In fact, she saw O.J. after the acquittal and thought seriously about running him over with her vehicle, but she just couldn't go through with it.

In her new book, “Can’t Forgive: My Twenty-Year Battle With O.J. Simpson,” Kim Goldman tells the story of what went through her mind. It’s been nearly 20 years since the murders of Ron Goldman and Nicole Brown Simpson, but it’s still fresh for the families of the victims.

"I was driving in a strip mall and this figure walked in front of my car, and I knew it was him,'' Goldman told Savannah Guthrie on TODAY. "I was 100 percent confident. I studied him, I watched him, I knew that swagger, and I put my foot on the pedal. I white-knuckled it, I was revving the engine, and I thought, 'I could take him out and nobody would ever know.'

"I thought of my dad, and I just couldn't put him through that, and I'm not a killer so that wouldn't be a part of me anyway, but I definitely fantasized it," she said. "There was nobody around. I thought, 'It's just him and me.' I had all that pent-up rage and anger, but at the end of the day, that's not who I am."

The O.J. Simpson trial captivated the nation from the opening statements on Jan. 23, 1995 right through to the momentous verdict of not guilty on Oct. 3, 1995. It was called "The Trial of the Century." The televised trial even had world leaders such as as Margaret Thatcher and Boris Yeltsin talking about it.

O.J. Simpson went to jail for 33 years for armed robbery and kidnapping in an unrelated case. That gave Kim Goldman a tiny bit of closure. “It’s justice for different reasons. There’s a little part of me that thinks, ’Finally, he’s locked away.’ Having him behind bars maintains some control in my life.”

Goldman also writes in her book about the suicidal thoughts she experienced during the course of the trial. "I couldn't manage the pain, and everywhere we went, everybody was talking about it and had an opinion about it,'' she said. "I couldn't escape it, no matter what I tried to do, and I just thought it would be easier sometimes. I'm so thrilled I don't obviously feel that way anymore, but the thoughts are in there. It took some time for me to get rid of them, but they're gone."

Kim Goldman still has not found total closure after Ron’s death. She admits to being frustrated when people ask her why she can’t move on.

"My brother's gone, and every day I'm reminded of his loss, and I've worked really hard to find a good, healthy balance in my life,'' she said."I'm an advocate for victim's rights, I counsel teenagers, I'm raising a beautiful 10-year-old. It's important for me to find a healthy way of coping. Writing was incredibly important to me. For as long as my brother's gone, the loss will be here, and there's no way to find closure in that."

Kim Goldman's book, "Can't Forgive: My Twenty-Year Battle With O.J. Simpson," was released on May 1 and is available at all major booksellers. There is a companion book, strictly about her brother Ron Goldman, "His Name Is Ron: Our Search for Justice."