One of the most common realities in adoption is attachment issues. Children and adults who were adopted may struggle with connecting with a new primary caregiver since they have often times experienced numerous caregivers in a very short period of time. This is especially the case if the child has been in several orphanages or in several foster homes prior to being placed with a forever family. However, there are many books and psychologists that can help provide insight for families who are preparing to adopt or for those who have recently discovered an attachment issue.
Adoptees who were involved in a closed adoption or an international adoption can struggle with the lack of genetic information they've been provided with about their biological relatives. In addition to this, adoptees may also struggle with the fact that they do not have any knowledge of what their parents look like. These concerns can become severe enough that they can cause psychological issues.
Adopted children and adults may also struggle with the fact that they are "different" than their adoptive parents and in some cases, their adopted parents other biological children. This too can result in some psychological problems for the adopted child.
In a closed adoption or an international program, adoptees may be upset with the fact that information was purposely withheld from them when they were unable to make decisions for themselves. This resentment can lead to anger toward the adopted or biological parents who were involved in the decision-making process.
These and many other realities are things adoptive parents should be aware of prior to making the decision to adopt. When educated, they can prepare themselves to deal with these issues as best as possible. It is important to note however, there are many adoptees that never encounter these struggles. Just as parenting a biological child has it's difficulties, it's how parents respond to the issues involved in adoption that can sometimes influence how severe the problems become.