Skip to main content
  1. Life
  2. Relationships
  3. Dating

Should a girl ask a guy out?

Dear Diva,
There is a guy that works in my office building that I run into often. He always smiles at me and says hi and a few times I thought I saw him giving me “the look”. We chatted for a bit at the coffee counter once and he wasn’t wearing a ring or anything… I was just wondering with all these new dating rules, is it cool now if I just go ahead and ask him out- maybe even just coffee or something?

Signed Smitten in Sagebrush

Dear Smitten,


Love, Diva

Ha ha. No seriously now, you have a good question. I personally don’t feel that a girl should ask a guy out. There are ways to have conversation, flirt, let him know your interested- but asking for the date is his job. OK, OK go ahead and preach to me about the modern woman. Done? Now let me tell you some truths:

A man that is interested will ask you out. It may take every ounce of courage that he has, but if a guy is truly interested he will find a way to talk to you, to make contact, or to see you. Especially if you have shown him in a subtle way that you are interested as well.

If you allow a man to know that you are interested and he is not asking you out- there is a reason for that. Maybe he is in a relationship, gay, or for no other reason than you are simply “Not what good looks like to him”.

But Diva! What if he is just shy? Nope. I am not buyin’ it.

So what to do?

Smile back when you see him. Make eye contact. When an opportunity presents itself, like running into each other at the counter- start a conversation. About anything- music, movies, sports- whatever. If he is interested he will see the opportunity and talk back! If you are at the coffee counter talking, you can always invite him to sit with you, a simple “You’re welcome to join me” may open the door for a friendly chat. But that is where it ends, you can only go so far. It’s up to him to close and if he isn’t, know that there is a reason for that, and move along. Keep smiling and a guy that really likes you will notice!

As usual, this is just one Diva’s opinion. I always welcome yours!






  • ESPYS party
    Athletes and celebrities hit the red carpet at Body at the ESPYS party
    Today's Buzz
  • Using metalic paint
    Metallic paint can be used to refinish furniture or to create the illusion of a larger space
    5 Photos
  • Gardening
    Have you ever started a garden and found a lone tomato straggler in with the strawberries?
    7 Photos
  • Adopt a shelter cat
    Ten great reasons to adopt a shelter cat: Just ask Willie Nelson's family
    9 Photos
  • Chikungunya virus
    Health news: Chikungunya virus has hit a man in Florida
    5 Photos
  • Oaks Spa
    Just keep moving is theme at Oaks at Ojai, California’s primo budget spa
    6 Photos