Shawn Johnson: Is She Dead?

 

The Onion is causing a stir with a video entitled, "Gymnast Shawn Johnson Put to Sleep After Breaking a Leg." This is brought to you by Ghostbusters the video game on ONN (the O is for Onion as in Onion News Network) on its "today NOW! show." Is it really open season on young adults? Is this the down side of winning Olympic gold and Dancing with the Stars?

In the video, the male broadcaster reports that Johnson broke her knee. The female broadcast, Tracy Gill adds that the injury is "a career ender" and the parents made the  "difficult decision to euthanize her."

Two actors appear as Johnson's parents, Doug and Teri Johnson. Doug states, "It's tough whenever you have to put a gymnast to sleep."

In the recently rediscovered play by Mark Twain, "Is He Dead?" the person in question, French artist Jean-François Millet (1814-1875), was not dead, but he was also very much in on the joke.  Johnson and her family were not in on the joke.

Further, The Onion Web site is not intended for readers and Internet users under the age of 18. Johnson is, and the video repeats this several times, only 17.

Isn't there better comedy to be found than to target underage and just newly minted adults for professionals such as The Onion and David Letterman? Unlike Sarah Palin, Johnson and her parents will not be commenting on the video. It might have been funnier if Johnson had been in on the joke and then perhaps the writers might have thought twice about some of the script.

The male broadcaster states, "Her hindquarters were so strong."

The subtitles tell us that Johnson's doctor also "euthanized skater Debbie Thomas after ankle injury." And we learn that the "'Dancing with the Stars' win raised value of Johnson's breeding stock."

"Shawn was only 17 years old so we never got to breed her," says Doug.

Isn't it a bit creepy to be talking about a 17-year-old's hindquarters and breeding stock? She was already the target of a stalker.To be fair they also take on adult women with their other video: "Online Dating Helping Pathetic Women Get Their Hopes Crushed more Efficiently. "

One of the reason Mark Twain's play was problematic was because it was about a real person, someone who was an adult, but not in on the joke. Twain's play is something suitable for an older teen, including a 17-year-old girl. His other writings such as "Tom Sawyer" and "Huckleberry Finn" are part of the curriculum for school age kids. If the Onion newspaper and the Web site isn't meant for 17-year-old people to read, why should it target one particular 17-year-old at all. Aren't there enough 18-year-old teens for ONN to focus on?