Shasta Assassins defeat The Flood

On Saturday, February 16, 2013 in Redding, CA, Shasta Roller Derby (SRD) hosted their first bout of the season against Flood Water Roller Derby (FWRD). This bout was a first for FWRD as well, their debut bout as a league in fact. But these weren't the only firsts at this very special bout. It is also the first time either league or the officiating crew participated in a bout under the no minors rule set.

And chaos ensued

From the very first moments of the bout, even before the bout officially began, confusion reigned. Both teams lined up (on the pivot line no less) and the bout started, with just one whistle. Knee-High Ninja of FWRD got out first for lead jam, scored two points and called it off. Then she came off the track only to realize that her first jam was actually a demo. Because it was deafening in the venue, she didn't realize this in time and the first official jam began without a FWRD jammer. Luckily Swift D Mize of SRD went to the penalty box and the jam was whistled dead. Is this the right course of action? Who knows?

New rules: new game

In fact, often throughout the bout, skaters on both teams felt the rules were being made up as they went along. Numerous official time-outs were called, and coaches and captains from both teams did a lot of conferring with head ref Married Juana, who handled himself wonderfully, never losing his temper, always willing to explain his interpretation of the rules.

FWRD was in the lead for about seven minutes of the first half before Shasta took control. Shasta’s jammers were big and fast, in a won’t be knocked down or out kind of way. Petite and unseasoned FWRD jammers like Scary Magdalene and Scarlet Reign were giving it their all but were no match for power blockers like Vonda Kut-A-Vitch and Rah Rah of SRD.

In contrast, FWRD blockers had equally as much trouble containing tiny jammer Lil' Beez Neez, and bruisers like NiNgirl Roxit and Lewis. In fact, Lewis was virtually unstoppable as a jammer and hit like a brick as a blocker.

Score at the half: 144-27, Shasta

After half time, The Flood got their sea legs back and tightened their game. Foxy Knoxy and Rosie Rampage made a barrier across the whole track while Double Painbow and Bad Astral doubled up on SRD's smaller jammers. SRD jammers had more trouble getting through, allowing FWRD to occasionally get lead and put some points on the board. Enya Dreamz of FWRD was released in the last quarter of the game and went on a 15-point power jam, much to SRD Coach Hyde Jobe Itch's surprise.

As the point spread got tighter, play got rougher for both teams. Whatever happened, even if a skater wasn't get pushed out of bounds or to the ground, they felt the wrath of solid hits. Every derby girl on the track that day was afraid she would be ejected for seven majors, having never played with the new rule set, but Martini Mama of FWRD was the lucky one, ejected about half way through the second half.

Final score: 253-109, Shasta

Does roller derby seem like the greatest thing ever? Well, it is. Do you want to be a part of The Flood? Of course you do. Tryouts are on Monday Feb. 26 at the Placer County Fairgrounds from 7-9 p.m. Come early for FWRD’s ribbon cutting ceremony, celebrating the leagues official entry into the world of roller derby and stick around to see if you have what it takes. RSVP with Scary Magdalene at metalethea@live.com. No gear, no problem. Don't know how to skate. That's okay, there are plenty of non-skating positions available. What have you got to lose?

Advertisement

, Northern California Roller Derby Examiner

Laurel Hanson aka Bad Astral, has been working as a roller derby journalist for nearly four years. As a derby skater and one of few female journalists in the sport, she is dedicated to life in the Derbyverse and to promoting derby and the opportunities it creates for women.

Today's top buzz...