Sex education discussions may be an awkward subject for parents and teens but it is very necessary. Kids are learning about sex at younger ages due to social media availability and the absence of moral guidance on TV, in music, and in open conversation with peers.
What used to be taught at home a generation or two ago, when kids were hitting puberty in the early teen years, is out of step and way too late for today’s teens. While teens may have the head knowledge about sex, they usually don’t have the emotional maturity to handle the objective areas of sexuality. Information taught in school is clinical, a science lesson.
Teens, tweens, and even younger kids still need the age appropriate parental discussions in an environment where they don’t have to posture or pretend to be tough and knowledgeable. That's where parents come in. Awkward as it may be, sex education is the parents’ responsibility. By reinforcing and supplementing what your adolescent learns in school, you can set the stage for a lifetime of healthy sexuality.
If parents wait for the perfect moment to discuss sexual issues, they may miss the best opportunities. Instead, think of sex education as an ongoing conversation. Here are some tips from Online Parent Coach.
Clearly state your feelings about specific issues (e.g., oral sex, intercourse). Present the risks objectively, including emotional pain, sexually transmitted infections, and unplanned pregnancy. Explain that oral sex isn't a risk-free alternative to intercourse.
If you're uncomfortable, say so, but explain that it's important to keep talking. If you don't know how to answer your adolescent's questions, offer to find the answers or look them up together.
Don't lecture your adolescent or rely on scare tactics to discourage sexual activity. Instead, listen carefully. Understand your adolescent's pressures, challenges and concerns.
Let your adolescent know that it's OK to talk with you about sex whenever he or she has questions or concerns. Reward questions by saying, "I'm glad you came to me about this."
Your adolescent needs accurate information about sex, but it's just as important to talk about feelings, attitudes and values. Examine questions of ethics and responsibility in the context of your personal or religious beliefs.
When a television program or music video raises issues about responsible sexual behavior, use it as a springboard for discussion. Remember that everyday moments (e.g., riding in the car, putting away groceries, etc.) sometimes offer the best opportunities to talk.
Sex education for adolescents includes abstinence, date rape, homosexuality, sexting and other tough topics. Read more here.
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